Lew & Laura

The labor of a lifetime :)

2011-08-16T19:24:00.004-04:00

Our sweet little Micah James is here! Born 8/16 7:43 am 7lbs 6oz 20.5 inches, and so far he is doing great!

Though this labor was shorter than Miya's (36 hours vs 48 hours) it was different is SO many ways and so much more intense. I can't even describe how I saw God's hand at work through this labor and delivery and so here I am about 12 hours after delivery documenting my "story" because I don't want to forget all the fun details :)

So buckle your seat belt and prepare for a LONG story (more like a book):

Things really started last Tuesday the 11th, I had been having regular strong contractions on and off for days but they finally picked up this day so I was told to head into L&D. Because of my history of a c-section and my desire for a VBAC they pretty much wanted me to come in if I had regular contractions lasting more than a couple hours. After 8 hours in triage being monitored and making no progress we had to choose whether we would stay and be admitted most likely needing to use pitocin to pick things up, or to go home and just wait things out. Since we were hoping for a natural birth I really wanted to avoid pitocin if possible so we decided to go home, slightly disappointed, but really at peace with the decision. Pretty much off and on the entire week I had strong regular contractions that would pick up and slow down. The midwives kept saying "this is just prodromal labor...and unfortunately some women have this for weeks before they deliver" yikes not what I wanted to hear! So we just kept waiting for things to pick up and were told to call when things contractions were stronger, longer, and closer together.

So we waited and waited, it was truly agonizing. I wasn't in a rush to get him out, but I was having such a hard time discerning when I was really in labor with all the contractions I was having! So night after night I would be awakened by strong painful contractions that would go on for a few hours then like switch would just turn off. By my due date (8/14) I felt weary and exhausted. I shed a few tears and I think I had started to convince myself that he was never going to come! In the meantime we are at church that day and I notice I am having contractions throughout the day that are definitely painful and at times regular, but with my track record I just disregarded them and tried to get on with the day. By about 5 pm they were coming 3 minutes apart consistently. Now I know you are thinking: "wow 3 minutes apart you better get to the hospital!" but apparently this is just what my body does, at some points I could have them 2-3 minutes apart yet they wouldn't really pick up in intensity and eventually would taper off. So, with that in mind I just decided to wait it out. We decided to drop Miya off at my parents so that we could at least have the freedom to walk etc.. to see if things picked up. A dear friend Ana who had been a doula for many woman came to stay with me so Lew could rest. Having her there was priceless. We spent the night walking, bouncing on the ball, and trying to relax. My biggest enemy seemed to be my nerves, things would pick up I would get frantic and that anxiety would slow things down. By 2am that is just what happened. I was exhausted, my contractions were spacing out and I just started to panic. I couldn't see things just tapering off again, I was tired and just wanted to have this baby! I was knew I needed sleep but I was so afraid if I tried to sleep that things would stop progressing and it would be just like starting over again. But thanks to the persistence of Lew and Ana I decided to go to sleep and try to rest for a few hours. I even decided to sleep sitting up so at least it would make it easier for things to progress if they were going to. At 530 am I woke up to a really strong contraction, and from that point on they kept coming 3-4 minutes apart (and even closer when I was walking) and more intense than they had been. By 9 I had talked to my midwife and we were on our way in to the hospital.

When we get there we get into triage. I was hopeful that with all these contractions I had been having that maybe I would see some progress past the 2cm I had been the past week. Well much to my surprise I was still the same old 2cm I had been, the midwife tried to be encouraging by saying "it's a good 2 cm", but to me it was still no progress. I was once again given the choice of staying and possibly having to help my contractions out with pitocin, or going home. Lew and I both felt like the best decision was to stay since it really seemed like my body was ready. I laughed and looked at the midwife and said "We aren't leaving without a baby" :). So, we were admitted and amazingly the "no turning back" feeling was SO calming to me and I was finally able to relax and just let labor pick up. But much to my dismay after about 6 hours of regular contractions I still was stuck at a 2cm. The midwives were about to switch over at 7pm and they basically presented the option of doing a small dose of pitocin to help my contractions to get stronger and closer together. At this point I was already having to be monitored the entire time, so without being able to walk etc... they didn't think things would pick up. Not only that but the OB who was back up on call for the midwives that night was one of the only ones who would approve pitocin for a VBAC so this was really my only chance. So, we went for it. I was kind of hesitant because I had really wanted to go natural (no pain meds). Why? Because I'm crazy :) But I knew we had tried everything to get things to pick up and if getting pitocin meant needing an epidural that still was much better than having to get another c-section in my opinion. So we started pitocin at 6:30pm.

At first it really freaked me out because the pitocin had started and I just completely stopped having contractions for about a 1/2 hour. I called the midwife Dusty in and she explained that pitocin works on a negative feedback loop so it takes a while for it to get into a good rhythm with your body's natural oxytocin. Thankful within the hour they were coming on at about 4 minutes apart and picking up in intensity. By about 11 if I remember correctly I was having to breath through them and really feeling a lot more pain by this point, but I remember still being really happy and talkative between contractions (Ana and Lew will have to verify that for me :)) Dusty came in to check for progress, and I knew from previous experience to set my expectations low. Thankful that I did because I was only 3cm and while I was 100% effaced baby boy still hadn't dropped very far. Dusty wasn't comfortable breaking my water because He wasn't low enough and I hadn't progressed enough. So we just kept going up on the pitocin and trying to encourage things along. At this point the "bomb" was dropped that the back up OB coming on in the morning at 7am was not supportive of pitocin in VBAC's so I was down to about 9 hours of having the pitocin and hopefully making progress. We all chuckled and looked at each other like "no way I'll still be in labor at that point". If only I knew :)

This is where I lose track of time some. I think by about 3am the pitocin was really in full swing contractions were coming about 2 minutes apart and all the sudden out of the blue I started to have the most wicked back pain I had ever felt in my entire life...actually I would say worst pain in general that I have ever felt. When the contractions would come on it would feel like my back was just going to break under the pressure. The weirdest thing was the pain was right under my rib cage, it made no sense and no one had ever seen that kind of pain in labor. They were thinking it was just referred pain. The only way I could survive a contraction was to have Ana or Lew put a lot of pressure right over the spot where it was hurting. Even still with that I was barely coping with contractions. And by 4am I was shaking, crying, and probably doing a lot of yelling/groaning. Amazing how quickly I lost my composure :) The nurse came in and saw me and said "uh-oh, let me get the midwife to check your progress" I thought for sure this intense pain would mean I was making some descent progress, at least I hoped!

Dusty came in and checked me...and boy was I shocked to hear I was only 4cm. At this point Dusty said "I think you are fighting against yourself at this point, I really think some pain control would help you relax enough to progress" That's all I needed to hear. Through tears I shouted "get me that epidural" :) The anesthesiologist came in and I have to say this was one of the hardest parts for me. I have a terrible fear of needles, and trying to stay still through not only the fear but the terrible contractions was very hard. Poor Lew had his hands squeezed to death, I am so glad I didn't break any of his fingers. Once it was in I only felt really numb on one side. But for the most part the back pain was gone and I was finally relaxed. Dusty broke my water at this point and said she would come back to check me again within the hour. The only bad part at was another nurse had temporarily taken over for my nurse and she didn't seem totally competent, or very nice at that. She wouldn't explain anything she was doing and just mumbled everything under breath. At this point I was so tired so I almost didn't care. I had sent Lew and Ana to sleep for a little bit, and had planned to try to rest myself. But at 430ish that same fill in nurse came in and just started flipping me around in the bed and I saw her turn off the pitocin and at this point she is still mumbling under her breath. I guess my feisty side came out as I asked her what on earth she was doing and she said "oh the baby". I'm like "the baby what!?" To which she said "baby's not liking this, we need to turn you." And at this point I say "Ummm, shouldn't you turn me on my left side and put some oxygen on me?" Never good when you are having to tell a nurse what to do, and I always try not to do that, but really? Anyways she turned me over and I just laid there crying. With my labor with Miya she had started to not tolerate the pitocin at the end and soon after I was getting a c-section. I was so afraid that we were heading in that direction after all this hard work. Plus we were losing precious time on the pitocin as I had only 2 hours left to be on it.

By 5am Dusty came in and checked me, I was only a 5. She started the pitocin again at a really low dose since Micah's heart rate had been stable again. While she was still hopeful she had to drop the bomb again...but only this time she had to mention the possibility of another c-section. She said I know you don't want to hear this, and I don't want to say it, but really by 7am we will need to keep the pitocin off. And if there is little to no progress by that point the on call OB will probably start to push towards a c-section. At this point I became totally determined and focused. I knew it seemed impossible that I would show enough progress in 2 hours especially since it had taken me almost 34 hours to get 2 cm. But I knew God was bigger and so Lew and I started calling/emailing people to pray.

By 530 am I was feeling some crazy intense pain and pressure despite the epidural. Contractions were no longer spaced out at all but coming right on top of each other. I started to feel really out of it and was shaking uncontrollably and gripping as tightly to the side rail as I could. They called the anesthesiologist in to give me a re-dose of the epidural. He came in and saw me and said "how far along did they say you had progressed at the last check?" I said "5cm" he said "I think you are further than that now!" Music to my ears. But I was too much "in the zone" to process anything. The epidural was working again but the shaking and pressure I was feeling was so intense. The nurse just looked at me and said "I think you are in transition, and I think you are in the home stretch." I was too afraid to admit that was true, because of the little progress over the past 34 hours, but I also knew I had never felt this way before. Plus from what I had read on transition this pretty much looked just as it was described. I started to tell Lew and Ana "I feel something, I think it's his head, but I don't know." I think they thought I was crazy at that point, I don't think any of us could believe I had progressed that far in less than an hour.

Dusty came in at 6am and looked at me and said "oh boy let's check you". She didn't have to do much checking because she immediately said "ummm yup you're feeling all this because his head is right here." We all just laughed and celebrated. I had just progressed 5-10cm in less than an hour and was ready to push. I don't think any of us had expected to actually make the 7am deadline, but we did, and I was practically giddy at this point. Dusty laughed and said "I did what always works to get a woman to progress: mention a c-section, and go take a nap!" They got the room geared up and it was time to push.

Amazingly this was the the part I feared the most, yet it ended up being by far the easiest part. Poor Lew had the job of holding my leg which was pretty much dead weight at this point. I think the funniest part of the labor was when he accidentally let go to get a drink of water and my leg fell on the midwife, thankfully she was paying attention and caught it, I think otherwise it would have knocked it out. Another funny part was just how giddy and happy I was while pushing. I think I was just so relieved to be almost done, and so thankful for my epidural :) A half hour through the pushing I was almost there and was even offering Lew sips of water between contractions. It was pretty funny. Almost an hour in I just knew this was going to be my last push, and it was, our little guy was born at 7:43am and it was seriously one of the most amazing joy filled moment of my life. To actually be an active part of the birth was so much different than my c-section with Miya, I was just so thankful to be able to see him and hold him right away. Not to have blue curtains separating me from him, and to have no one snatching him out of my arms after only 5 minutes. I got to hold him for a good 45 minutes after the birth and the room just was full of happiness. The nurses were great, the midwives were great, Ana and Lew were the best supports I could have asked for. It truly was one of the hardest and most amazing experiences of my entire life. And yet even in that moment I'm pretty sure I looked at Lew and said "I could do this 10 more times" and Lew got a nervous look on his face and said "umm maybe" The amnesia that follows birth is probably one of the most miraculous parts of it all.

After the deliver was just so peaceful. I felt like I was surrounded by friends and it was really just a great experience. I was full of energy which was incredible because I had only slept 3 hours in 48 hours. But I felt so good, and so proud :)

That's the story! So far the recovery has been great. I feel good, and have to keep being reminded to rest because I feel so "normal" it's almost hard to remember it's just been over a week. I am so thankful for the gift these 2 kiddos are. I know big adjustments are ahead, especially for Miya. But all in all I couldn't be more thankful.

Blogger isn't letting me post pictures, so you can check out the facebook album here.

36 week update...

2011-07-21T08:12:00.003-04:00

Had my 36 week appointment this week, seriously having a hard time believing we are really that close (I will actually be 37 weeks the day after tomorrow, yikes!). So far Micah is head down (yay!) I am 1cm dilated and 50% effaced. About what I expected at this point. The midwife said he is in a "good" position, I'll take her word for it :) Our goal is to go for a VBAC (avoid another c-section) and so far the midwives are very hopeful that I will be able to do that, Lord willing. So what's on my agenda the next 3 weeks? Well I decided to schedule myself up until my due date, it helps keep me moving and so far I am still feeling really good physically so I figure why not? Sleep hasn't been great, but that isn't a surprise, and amazingly my body has gotten used to sleeping in 3 hour increments and somehow I still make it through the day without feeling too bad.

The common question I have been asked lately: (I guess it's twofold :)) "Are you ready?" and "is the nursery ready?" I just have to chuckle about the nursery question because my answer is a resounding.... No :) I have been totally unmotivated this time to work on his room. I have some things to hang and a few ideas, but I just keep thinking that he will be in our room for a little while and I'm sure I will have time while on my maternity leave to work on his room. And hopefully we will be have miya out of the toddler bed by then so we can turn it back into a crib for Micah. Until then, little man will just room in with us, and if that doesn't work then he can sleep in his pack-n-play. We still need to get some furniture for his room and I am so caught up in just keeping up with the day to day that this hasn't been high on my list....but eventually it will get done, and little man will be none the wiser :)

Hard to believe he could come any time now. Miya is getting excited and keeps asking "when we going to da hospital to get baby micah?"

Motherhood is a Calling

2011-07-15T07:37:00.002-04:00

If you haven't read this yet, I suggest you hop over to desiring God to check it out, you won't regret it!!

Motherhood is a Calling

It's an article written by the woman who wrote "Loving the Little Years: Motherhood in the Trenches" one of my newest favorite books. A huge plus is you can read the book in one sitting if you want.

Big girl.

2011-07-11T07:42:00.003-04:00

Something about being in the last month of this pregnancy is making me nostalgic, probably the awareness that time will only speed up with the addition of another child. It hit me this past week that when people ask how old Miya is, we no longer refer to her age in "months" as we have pretty much her whole life. It was always natural to respond with oh she's __ months. Now we just say...."oh she turned 2 in March" or she'll be 2 1/2 soon, or in the especially frazzled moments "she's 2". I just have such a hard time believing how big she is getting and I just keep feeling that I not only want to soak up every moment with her, but also realizing how much I want to document so I can remember all this fun stuff!

What she is saying: (or should we say what is she NOT saying...the talking seems to never stop :))

- "Make baby Micah dance!" She somehow finds some amusement in me moving my belly so she can see micah "dance"

- "Oh I love lemolade, I will have mommy's lemolade!" Referring to my water with lemon in it :)

- "Hug Mommy...I NEED to hug Mommy" usually said with urgency, and usually during a time where she is being asked to do something she doesn't want to.

- "Jesus pweas help Miya...I'm pwaying!!" Bless her heart Miya has been saying these little short prayers on her own these days and the funniest part is she realizes she is saying them and all the sudden stops praying and yells "oh I'm pwaying!!" as if it catches her by surprise, or she wants to make sure Mommy and Daddy know.

- "I need to go poo poo!" (repeated over and over and usually with tears and holding on to mommy and or daddy with a death grip) not to be confused with the casual "i need to go to potty", in this instance this is her "catch phrase" when she is terrified of something and wants one of us to save her. She will repeat this over and over and over usually followed by "I need to go home". A few of her BIG fears/dislikes lately:

airshow and any loud airplanes
any sudden loud noises
fireworks
parades
clowns

I feel like there is more but those are the major ones for now. Why she chooses this phrase when she is afraid? We think she believes that if she says it we will remove her from the situation or person that is scary to her.

- "Papa you want to go to a baseball game? yeah yets go to a baseball game" a girl after her daddy's heart.

- When I put her down in her big girl bed she has learned to say "don't get out until mommy comes to get you!" amazingly she also tells on herself when she doesn't obey this rule by immediately saying when I come in to get her "Miya get out."

- "Chawge!" she is in love with the "charge" cheer at baseball games, in fact she sometimes wants us to cheer it while she is on the potty.

- "I wuv baby Micah, can I hug him?" followed by hugs and kisses to my belly.

- "I'm fwimming!" still love how she still sometimes replaces her "s" with a "f" sound. She is referring to swimming here, her favorite summer activity thus far.

- She understands consequences at this point. When we ask her what happens when she disobeys she replies with " Miya gets an ipapwin" pronounced just like dicipline but missing the d and with the "w" sound replacing the "l" sound. Silly girl.

She has been so affectionate and silly. I love this age so much, even in though it truly is the most exhausting stage of motherhood so far. She says so many funny things and does so many funny things. Trying to soak up all this 1 on 1 time we have before Micah comes.

A few other quirks I want to remember:

She insists on sleeping with 15+ stuffed animals and dolls. She is literally surrounded by them all
She loves fruit and many times will choose fruit over other forms of dessert
She has just started to name her stuffed animals and dolls and carry them around like they are her babies
She likes to carry funny little random toys and place them at funny places all over the house, bathroom, steps, foyer, underneath furniture. It makes for a fun treasure hunt at the end of the day after she goes to bed.

She is also 90% potty trained. Basically completely trained during the day (woohoo!) and still working on nighttime. But truthfully, having her trained during the day has been awesome now that she finally gets it! But getting there was quite the challenge. Figuring out the right routine and helping to work through her fears of public bathrooms. But I am happy to report on Wednesday for the first time EVER Miya actually went potty in a public restroom! It was such a triumph, after MONTHS and MONTHS of her refusing to even want to sit on a public toilet, let alone even enter a public bathroom, she not only sat on the potty but actually went. We made a huge deal and she got ice cream afterwards. It makes it so much easier when we are out and about now.

That's it for now. I will do a pregnancy update after my 36 week appointment on Wednesday. Hard to believe I am that close!

My weakness...

2011-06-16T07:14:00.002-04:00

If your thinking "blogging is sure a weakness" considering it's been, I dunno 6 months or more since I blogged. Yep I would say I've been pretty "weak" in blogging, but that's not what I am referring to :)

God has been opening my eyes to my weakness lately and as I was journaling/praying some this morning I realized this is a snapshot that I want to capture and keep for years ahead when I need encouragement. Here is a little tidbit from my journal this morning to clue you in on what life has been like lately. Maybe some of you Mom's can relate...

"Last night was a LONG restless sort of night. Miya was up crying several times for no real reason. I had a hard time sleeping and getting comfortable and just when I would fall asleep she was cry again. In the midst of the restlessness my mind started to race and I was filled with anxiety about baby Micah's arrival and the sleepless nights that await me. Then it hit me that these are opportunities for me to turn to you and trust You. Times where you are preparing me for what is to come. Not so I can fret over the days ahead, bu so I can press into you and sow seeds of faith in my heart now to prepare me for what is to come. This is, in many senses, Your kindness to me. I don't want to go into this next season naive to the challenges. Yes having a newborn will be exhausting at times, yes Miya has entered a very challenging stage requiring much time, patience, and training, yes balancing life with 2 kids will mean less time and energy for my wants and desires, yes sleepless nights and days are in my future--BUT God promises grace for all of these things, He promises to have gone before me and promises to know all my weakness. He promises his grace is sufficient and his strength is made perfect in weakness. So I don't have to look ahead in fear, but I can have eyes of faith for what God is doing and will do in the future!"

This is just a glimpse into where my heart was this morning, the word "weakness" sums up how I have felt the last few weeks. Physical weakness as I enter the last 2 months of my pregnancy and chase a busy toddler. Emotional weakness as I parent a toddler who many times has a mind of her own and a will that seems so insurmountable; at times I can feel like giving up is the easier bet. Sometimes it's laughable how God is using Miya to show me my weakness. She pinpoints just about every trigger I have to the point where my nerves feel shot by the end of the day. Don't get me wrong about how much I love our girl, and how thankful I am to be her mommy. None of that has changed. But we have entered what has become the most difficult stage so far, and there have been days where I cry out "ummm God I can't do this!" After a challenging few days where I feel like everything has been a battle with her and I have been so tempted to be angry towards her disobedience, even tempted to think that somehow working full time would be easier; God has opened my eyes to his purposes in all this. He is using Miya to show me how dependent I am on Him. He has perfectly tailored this girl to point me to grace and show me my complete helplessness. Of course Miya has no clue at this point the role she plays in this, she is just a sinful toddler who wants her way and will fight for it, but God is using her in big ways to humble me. All this to say it's nights like last night that I am so aware of what God is doing, and so aware of my need to cry out constantly. I can't go a day or hour without crying out because I am aware of my weakness on so many levels.

I have been reading one of my favorite parenting books by Elyse Fitzpatrick lately called "Give them Grace", I couldn't recommend more highly. Here are a few portions that have stuck out to me:

"It is a kindness when he strips us of self-reliance, because it is there, in our emptiness and brokenness, that we experience the privilege of his sustaining grace. It is only when we arrive at that dreaded place of weakness that we discover the surpassing power of Christ. It is only when we are finally freed from the oh-so-constricting straighjackets of self-righteousness that we are able to experience that true comfort and warmth of the robes of righteousness."

"The compliant child's life lies to us, assuring us that she is good because we're such good parents. Difficult children tell us the truth: God loves his enemies, and he can infuse us with a grace that will make us lay down their lives for them too. Their rebellion is a verification of the gospel: we produce sinful children because we are sinners. God's power is displayed through our failures when we tether ourselves to the gospel message of sin and forgiveness, no matter how how desperate the situation becomes."

So all in all I am feeling very humbled right now, but also very blessed. Blessed by the gift of motherhood and how God is using it to strip away life's comforts to allow me to grow in perseverance and grace. Stripping away the layers of "ease" that I can idolize so much and showing me a better way in laying down my life.

I can look ahead in excitement for how God will meet me as we welcome our boy in less than 2 months. I don't have to look ahead with fears of "how will I do it!?" But I can rest assured that on my own I can't do it, but thankfully Christ lived the perfect life for me so I can claim this promise:

Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
(Hebrews 4:14-16 ESV)

Amen!

Zoo

2011-04-08T09:00:00.013-04:00

We had the joy of having the Lewis family visiting this past week, and took advantage of the one beautiful day we had with temps into the 80's! Who knew how precious a little sunshine could be when we have had such a dreary spring so far. So we went to the zoo. My original thought was: this is perfect we will go around 10 (metro down) walk around, grab lunch, walk around some more looking at animals, take our time...and head home around 3ish to beat rush hour. Yes that meant skipping naptime, but come on we're talking about the zoo here! Well we all know things never go how we "imagine" them with a toddler.

So our day looked more like: leave the house closer to 11, get down to DC closer to 12, try to convince a hungry tired toddler that she'd rather look at animals in the distance than eat lunch (didn't win that one) then to cave after only being there for 20 or so minutes by standing in line for 30 minutes at the only open place to buy lunch (after snacks didn't suffice) walk around for about another 1/2 hour to 45 minutes...then to have our toddler convince us she was ready to go home around 1:30. Def. not as I expected, BUT if you ask Miya about her zoo experience she will say it was SO FUN! She thought it was awesome. I think toddlers are just that fickle :) And truly I am convinced 2 hours feels like 5 to a child. So in her eyes she was there all day!

Either way it was a fun memory and Miya did have lot's of highlights that she is still talking about today. Her favorite? The panda! The funniest thing was this was the furthest away animal she saw. You can see in the pic below the panda sitting in tree eating a branch. As miya describes: "panda pull down da bwanch and eat it!" she will say it over and over again laughing every time. It was definitely her highlight, and I now think panda's are her "favowite" animal.

Miya's fav spot to be perched: "papas showdas"

engrossed in her panda viewing.

sunny sunglasses day :)

she really was that enthralled by the panda!

These orangutangs were the cutest. The were so lovey dovey and just kinda snuggled together every once and a while posing for a picture

Hanging with Nana and Dedad

Miya loves her dedad!

mmm "pwum" miya is obsessed with them lately.

the "zebwas" another miya highlight

All in all Miya was satisfied with her trip, and mommy got some mango gelato (for a whopping 5 bucks for a small....gotta love those zoo prices :)) so I'd say it was a win.

We are having...

2011-04-08T08:30:00.003-04:00

So I feel like most people know by now....but I'm sure some don't:

BOY!

We had our ultrasound 2 weeks ago and baby boy appears nice and healthy, praise God! And I am measuring right on time at just about 22 weeks for our due date of August 14th. I am feeling good now, the nausea finally passed around 17 weeks and my energy (though it isn't close to what I had in my 2nd trimester w/ Miya) has improved much form the 1st trimester. I blame the lesser energy on my busy toddler :) Miya is very excited about her baby "bwotha" and we have already decided on a name: Micah James Lewis.

We picked Micah for the meaning: "who resembles God", and James after James in the bible (Jesus' brother). The book of James has been extremely influential in my life since finding out we are expecting this baby, so we knew we wanted to have it in there.

We are getting more excited as we anticipate welcoming sweet Micah into our family.

Dear Miya...

2011-03-14T15:04:00.003-04:00

Dearest Miya,

I have so poorly captured this past year, and I will never be able to catch up now, but I have to pause now to remember you just as you are right now, since I can't hit pause (though I wish I could often) I don't want to forget these fun memories!

In a few short weeks you will be 2, and I can barely stand how quickly you are growing. In about 22 weeks you will become a big sister, and I know you will be a wonderful big sister! You already show so much interest in "the baby" as you talk to and kiss my belly on a daily basis. You call "it" baby boy and we will find out soon if you are right! I can't help but think that you might get along better with a little brother than a sister, we will see!

You are talking up a storm, and you keep daddy and I in stitches when you open your mouth! A few of your latest phrases are:
"what dats?" you are so curious and want to know what everything is!
"what you doing mommy" another frequently asked question, you always want to know what I am up to :) Sometimes you will ask 20 times in a row
You have begun to ask me questions only to answer with the same thing you think I am going to say. Mommy has discovered that she needs to come up with some new responses to your questions: "mommy yet's go outside? nope we're done. Watch leapfrog? nope we're done. Play choo choo train? nope we're done."
"mommy tiss!" you sometimes mix up your "K" sounds with t's so when you mean to ask for a kiss you tend to say tiss instead.

You are doing well with going on the potty. You generally go poo poo on the potty every day, Mommy just needs to get more consistent about putting you on for pee pee too. But you are so good about telling me when you need to go!

You have been so snuggly with me lately, I think you might be able to sense a big change coming. But I don't mind one bit. One thing I have learned this past year is time flies way too fast, and I know it won't be long before you will no longer want snuggles and won't even fit in my lap because my belly will be too big. So I am soaking it all in. Daddy thinks I am crazy, but occasionally you will wake up crying late at night, normally we would let you fuss for a few minutes and you would go right back to sleep, but now I jump right up and run in to rock you for a few minutes. I just can't miss a moment with you, I know you won't be my littlest for long and I can't fathom missing any chances I have to spend those quiet moments with you.

Spring is coming and you love playing outside! Every chance you get you want to go out for walks, and the whole time you point out anything and everything. Birds! Airplanes! Trees! Flowers! People! I love your excitement over every little thing, it's absolutely contagious.

You looove to sing, many times we catch you sitting on the floor playing while you sing "amazing grace" or "holy God" or "twinkle twinkle" and our favorite "God bless america" you amaze us with your ability to remember the lyrics to songs and we love to hear your joyful heart as you sing.

You have also become quite mischievous these days. You have discovered how to remove your clothes and diaper during naps or bedtime, several times mommy has come in to find you completely naked, and thankfully we can solve it at nighttime by putting your pj's on backwards. Still trying to figure out a naptime solution. You also have discovered a new fun trick: climbing out of your crib! I never thought I would see the day, but boy was I surprised when I heard that first boom from your room during naptime. I came running up to find you, little "houdini" out of her crib and apparently unscathed. We have now figured out that we can turn you crib around so the shorter side is against the wall, and you haven't quite figured out how to climb out from the side....and I am hoping that you don't figure it out either :)

You are still a good eater, but starting to get more picky. You love fruit, and especially Boobooberries (blueberries) as you refer to them. You ask for them every single meal, and if I say they are all gone you want proof! In fact if I tell you anything is all gone you demand to "see all gone" meaning you want to see the empty container. Silly girl. You also still love beans and rice, but aren't a huge fan of meat. You will eat meant however if we give you something to "dip" it in. Typical toddler.

I have been praying for a tender heart for you lately, praying that God would give me wisdom in how to show you grace. I have seen God working in many ways. We have been trying to teach you to pray and it has many times melted my heart to hear you say "jesus pwease help" on your own initiative. Baby steps, but thankful to see God at work nonetheless.

I love you sweet girl, being your Mommy has been one of the greatest joys of my life. I can't wait to see what the year ahead holds, and all that God has in store.

Love,
Mommy

Let's talk food...

2011-02-16T08:43:00.003-05:00

I'm thrilled to be able to talk (let alone think) about food again without getting sick. I have finally gotten into a groove again with dinners, but I have been wanting to do more baking than anything, which has kept my family very happy :)

I have a load of recipes to share that have been on our favorite list lately. Here goes:

Vegetarian: I am beginning to think we breed vegetarian babies. This pregnancy, what are the first things I want once I am feeling well enough to stomach normal food? Beans and lentils. Strange. And not only that, but after 4 vegetarian meals last week I watched miya scarfing down all variety of beans and lentils...and learned that this child LOVES beans. She will turn her nose at beef and chicken, but give her beans and she will devour them. And hey it's cheap and good for you, so we'll roll with it.

Coconut Rice & Beans

1 cup sweetened flaked coconut (I used unsweetened b/c I had it on hand)
1 cup chicken broth
3/4 cup coconut milk
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
3 tablespoons butter, divided
1 1/4 cups uncooked basmati rice (I used brown basmati)
1 small onion, chopped
1 (15-oz.) can black beans, drained and rinsed (I used dried beans that I soaked and cooked)
1 can black eyed beans, drained and rinsed
1 teaspoons chili powder
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 red pepper, chopped (optional)
1 lime
2 green onions, thinly sliced
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro

Toppings: lime wedges, diced mango, sour cream, cilantro, green onion. (the mango I had wasn't ripe, so I just sliced up some peeled naval orange over top, it was delish)

Preparation
1. Preheat oven to 350°. Bake coconut in a single layer on a baking sheet 8 to 10 minutes or until toasted. Cool.
2. Bring broth, coconut milk, salt & pepper, 2 Tbsp. butter, and 1 cup water to a boil in a 2-qt. saucepan. Stir in rice. Cover, reduce heat to low, and cook 15 to 20 minutes or until rice is tender and water is absorbed.

A few more:
Martha's Bean Burritos
Seriously the best bean burritos ever. They freeze amazingly, in fact we have a big batch in the freezer that we grab from for lunches and dinners, they reheat so well.

Black Bean Soup
LOVE this so much. It's super easy, and you can used dried beans too, but I usually end up using canned ones that I just rinse to get rid of extra sodium. Also I have found it's pertinent to use a fresh salsa for this (you know the kind you can find in the deli or at the refrigerated section at Trader Joes?) It turns out SO much better with fresh salsa. We serve it with sour cream and sometimes a dab of homemade guacamole on top. Actually having leftovers of this today for lunch. It's yummy with quesadillas to dip or tortilla chips.

Coconut red lentil soup
Got this one from my SIL and it was so yummy, and make great leftovers too.

Ok we do have some meat dishes we like too :)

Just made this Beef Pepperoncini last night with some of the grassfed cow that has been hanging out in the freezer, it was really good and really easy. We served it on some warmed focaccia rolls with a little mayo and some melted muenster cheese.

And for sweet goodies, that have been rocking my pregnant world lately:

Peanut Butter Banana Bread
Need I say more? I mean this was so good, the best banana bread I have ever had. VERY moist and the peanut butter flavor is soooo good. I used 3 ripe bananas and that seemed to be perfect. I didn't use the flax because I didn't have it on hand, and I didn't use the peanuts either for the same reason.

Coconut oil Choc. Chip Cookies
Ok so I changed the title (the blog calls them "Bye Bye Butter Cookies" and I love butter too much to ever say goodbye) but I didn't have any on hand so I thought I would give this a shot....and SERIOUSLY best cookies ever. I cooked them the least amount stated on the recipe and they stayed really really moist and chewy and fluffed up just like she described in the recipe. We loved them and devoured them in record timing. The only adaption I made was I used whole wheat pastry flour. They were truly the perfect cookie, I think I will go make some more right now......

And one that I would like to try soon:

Apple Coffee Cake in the crockpot
This just sounds good, and has so little sugar. I haven't tried any dessert baking in the crockpot but figure it's worth a try! I don't have the smaller slow cooker so I would probably try putting a bread pan in my larger slow cooker as she describes. Anybody tried this?

And that is what's on my mind lately :)

Many are the plans...

2011-02-14T07:41:00.004-05:00

Many are the plans in the mind of a man,
but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.
(Proverbs 19:21 ESV)

This passage has been one that has both been encouraging and humbling in the past few months. There is something humbling about knowing we can plan and plan with the best of intentions, but ultimately God is sovereignly reigning over our lives and circumstances. I have had much proof of this lately.

First I have to refer you back to this post on waiting, specifically this portion:

I feel like we are currently in the "school" of waiting. Waiting for a new job for Lew, waiting to figure out where we are going to live...eventually :)...waiting to decide if we should buy or rent a home...waiting on more children...

I think we are always "waiting" for something. But certain seasons the waiting seems more daunting and wearisome. But in each season I am SO aware of how God's grace carries me through the waiting and how much I am learning in the process. It's so easy to be looking forward to the outcome...the thing we are waiting for. But really it's the process that bears the sweetest fruit.

To follow that let me give you a little time line from the last year to sum up the amazing ways we have seen God provide, in many ways God's provision came at a time that was a complete surprise to us, times when we weren't sure what He was doing, and when we "thought" we knew what direction we were heading in. Little did we know God was taking us in a completely different direction.

January 2010: After much prayer we move out of our apartment and in with my parents with the goal to pay off debt and possibly save for a home. Lew is also continuing to aggressively search for a new job at this time as his current one has no potential for professional growth.

Febuary 2010: God plants a seed in our hearts that I should possibly pursue going back to work in a hospital setting where the pay is better and where I can work nights to allow me to still be home with Miya during the days. This was a very VERY scary idea for me. It required a lot of faith and prayer for me to feel ready to move forward with this, mainly because I felt so out of the loop since having Miya and wasn't sure how I would juggle home life and work again. But after a chat with my sister in law Rachel who is also a nurse she encouraged me to "not fear or shrink back from hard things." In other words just because things are hard, doesn't mean we are not called to face them. That was all I needed to hear, she was right and I moved forward by applying to the PICU at Shady Grove Hospital. After getting called in to meet with the nurse recruiter I was told the PICU had no positions, but that I could still chat with the nurse manager that day in case something opened up. After meeting with the nurse manager she offered me a job on the spot. And not just any job but the exact position I wanted, which would allow me to work just one 12 hour night shift a week. Clearly God's provision....

March 2010: Miya turned one year, and I start working in the PICU. It was a big adjustment, but after this first month I began to see what a blessing it was. I loved the nurses I was working with and God was pouring out much grace for the transition. Living with my parents was a huge blessing during this transition because we had lots of help and extra hands!

April-July We spent this time just working and aggressively paying off debt. Miya was able to thoroughly enjoy by parents big backyard and I was able to plant my first vegetable/herb garden. We also were able to enjoy a great summer trip to Indiana as well as a beach trip to OC with my family.

End of July 2010: Lew and I start talking about a timetable for trying for another baby. We both knew we didn't want a huge gap between our kids, and because we had no clarity yet on whether we would buy or rent, we decided to not prevent pregnancy and see what God did....

August: Lew is still aggressively pursuing work at this point, still no major leads. BUT we were able to pay off Lew's car at this point which was resulted in much rejoicing!

September-October: By the end of October not yet pregnant and feeling ready to begin to pursue options for where to live, we decided to get back in touch with our realtor and broker to see what would be a good option for us at this point. We also decided to hold off on trying for kids until we had more clarity about whether we would buy or rent.

November: we meet with our realtor and broker and are approved for a loan! We begin our search with the caution that it may be difficult to find something we really like right away in our price range and in less than 2 weeks (I kid you not) found a home and had an offer down. We had our home inspection and Lew and I were discussing if this was the home we really wanted to buy. There was more cosmetic work to be done than we had realized, but otherwise the home was in great shape.... we decided to take a night to pray on it and talk more about it. That night we talk and really have faith for it. The next morning I awoke with a jolt and for some reason had this inkling of suspicion that I might be pregnant. Call it a woman's intuition :) Well a pregnancy test immediately confirmed that suspicion. I cried as I told Lew not because I was sad, but just shocked! But we had a BIG decision to make. Do we move forward with this home? Some of you may remember that I got pregnant with Miya when we were pursuing buying a home last time (almost 3 years ago) so there is something about home buying that brings babies for our family! Either way we decided we had faith to move forward and confirmed our offer on the home. 4 days later I began to miscarry. There was a lot of confusion in my heart as I battled with trying to understand what God was doing...but there was also peace. I just knew God was in control and had a lot of faith as we moved forward with buying our home.

December 2010:
We excitedly settle on our house December 7th. All went without a hitch and we were very excited to move in. I had begun to feel extremely exhausted but just chalked it up to packing and working etc... I mentioned to Lew how tired I was and jokingly mentioned the possibility of being pregnant again. He laughed and responded: " what are the chances of that!?" I decided to find out by taking a pregnancy test. And it appears the chances are good enough because the test came back positive...again! It was like deja vu. I couldn't believe it...neither of us could. And amazingly I had forgotten to cancel the doctors appointment that I had made the month earlier so I was able to go in early on to see how things were going...we got a good report and days later moved into our home. Around the same time Lew saw a job that he was very interested in on Dice.com, but being so busy caring for a sick pregnant wife and chasing a wild toddler AND helping unpack and settle just didn't have time to apply. We spent our first Christmas in our new home.

January 2011: My sickness hit an ultimate high this month. This pregnancy has definitely been more difficult than my last but I think moving, caring for a busy toddler, and growing a baby is quite the load to carry :) This month Lew gets an email from a recruiter saying they saw his resume on dice.com and thought he was a perfect fit for the job. As soon as Lew looked at the job description he realized it was the exact job and company he had seen and wanted to apply for in January! God had brought the job to him. Lew interviewed and had a job offer almost a week later, he accepted.

It's been amazing to see how God provided for us. Granted in praying for all these major things we didn't expect God to give them to us in a short 2 month span, but I just can't help but laugh when I think about how easy it is for me to think I have every thing under control, all my plans laid out...then it's like the control is gone, the plans shaken...and boy am I glad. God's plans have always been better than ours, and I'm thankful he doesn't let us have it our way, or I wouldn't have this wonderful blessing growing in my belly.

I am just over 14 weeks and just coming out from under this sickness. Keeping food down and more thankful for health and energy than I ever have been. My due date is August 14th and if this little one cooperates we may find out the gender March 6th. Well there is my book... I never have been good at keeping things brief :)

signed.sealed.delivered

2010-12-07T19:23:00.002-05:00

(Miya showing off her "new housh" as she likes to say :)

We are officially homeowners! It feels pretty surreal, settlement went as smooth as can be (even after being totally sleep deprived after getting called into work at 2am...gotta love being on call the night before closing :))

I feel a little overwhelmed with the amount of work to be done this week with painting, packing, and moving...but as Lew says: one day at a time.

God has been so faithful! Can't wait to move in this week!

Themes.

2010-12-06T11:28:00.003-05:00

I am such a "themes" person. The wheels have been turning as I have been trying to think of what theme Miya's new room should be, and how I want to incorporate her nursery theme which was an aviary theme with birds and owls. So... I decided we are going to do a Nature theme, so we can still have our birds and owls but I also want to have other forms of nature/creation in there as well.

I have many ideas on diy stuff I'd like to do...but that will have to wait until we finish packing and moving. But today I made this picture for Miya's room:

I just need to find a square frame for it, I can't wait to hang it! I am planning to gather most of my inspiration from this etsy shop All I used to make this was some cardstock and decorative paper I had on hand and it took about 20 minutes!

Sooo many cute ideas! And the cutest thing about this song is we have been singing it to her since she was born. Definitely a favorite...and now she loves "shunshine" and every morning insists I open up her blinds first thing and sing the "shunshine" song :)

Talk talk talk.

2010-11-30T11:55:00.002-05:00

That is what Miya does these days. She talks and talks and talks some more. We call her a parrot because she literally repeats us on most things. Here is a few of my recent favorites:

Indy-nana: Her word for where Nana lives "Indiana". This one makes me smile :)

Appa-shauce: Apple sauce. The girl loves it

Yo-gabgabblagaba: yo gabba gabba, her favorite show. She thinks daddy is DJ lance. She really does.

Ha-ya-yu-ya: Hallelujah

HOTDOG: she says it crystal clear now. And she wants them for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert.

Outside-bug: Why she says this every time we talk about outside I will never know. But whenever we talk about going outside she yells "outside bug" over and over

Fru-fruit: Grapefruit. One of her favorite fruits. But we have learned to limit her after we discovered what too many can do to her GI tract. Not fun.

Dant-do: thank you. Love when she says this.

No-dant-do: when she doesn't want something she says this.

Yes-peas: Yes please. Love to hear this one too!

Poopoo potty! Hear this one A LOT. Sometimes it's genuine...other times we just spend a 1/2 hour in the bathroom with no success.

But on that note....
Potty update: She is going in the potty regularly, we have good days in bad but she is definitely telling us when she needs to go, and there have been times she has held in when we are in the car etc.. It's definitely time consuming....but I have to say she is essentially training herself. She is definitely at the point where she hates going in her diaper, and she loves to get a treat. So it's a win-win. It will be interesting to see if this continues once we move, but we'll see!

She is definitely growing up! Hard to believe she is only about 4 months away from turning 2.

Forget not.

2010-11-30T08:20:00.002-05:00

Yesterday we drove back from visiting Lew's family in Indiana and came home to an email that said our final approval came through on our loan for the house. I am absolutely blown away by how smooth this process has been. God has provided for EVERY. SINGLE. STEP of the way. Literally. And I am truly in awe. In awe of how God has provided grace over this past year of being without a "home" of our own. The blessing my parents have been to share their home with us and our busy/noisy toddler (grin) and the blessing family and friends have been to encourage us and pray for us. And here we are, exactly a week away from our settlement date, and I am just so thankful.

It was perfectly fitting that I read this in Deuteronomy 6 this morning:

“And when the LORD your God brings you into the land that he swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give you—with great and good cities that you did not build, and houses full of all good things that you did not fill, and cisterns that you did not dig, and vineyards and olive trees that you did not plant—and when you eat and are full, then take care lest you forget the LORD, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.
(Deuteronomy 6:10-12 ESV)

That is my prayer. "Lord don't let me forget that all of this is from YOUR hand. This is YOUR provision, a house that you built, and you will fill. Please don't let me forget your faithfulness and provision." God has surly been good, even in the waiting.

.Unchanged.

2010-11-01T07:46:00.003-04:00

This past 2 weeks has been crazy to say the least. Exactly 2 weeks ago Lew and I were in a very different situation. We are still living with my parents, and at the time had little faith to buy a home as Lew still hasn't found a new job, and we weren't sure if we should commit to buying something without knowing where he would be working. But two weeks ago I really begin to think and wonder....do we trust God for a home? Do we trust that God can provide a place for us, in a way that we couldn't have seen coming. Do we believe God is wiser than us?

At this point we are coming up on a year living with my parents. It has been year full of challenges as we aggressively pay off debt and mesh 6 adults and one toddler into one home. There have been many sweet times, but of course there are challenges too. Lew has been looking for a new job now on and off for 2 years. So, 2 weeks ago as I began to ask the above questions I also raised them to Lew. I think we can easily be more focused on what we don't have, and less aware of what God has already provided. It all the sudden hit us that we were missing the huge provision that God has already given us in Lew's current job. This has been a steady job and a secure job for our family, an answer to prayers almost 4 years ago. The company is doing well and this job has allowed a lot of flexibility for our family. It may not be exactly what Lew is looking for, but it's a job, and a gift. Not only that but God graciously provided a job for me, where I can work very little and still be a big means of support for our family, which has allowed me to keep my primary "job" in the home. Another huge means of provision from the Lord. Long story short 2 weeks ago God planted seeds of faith in our hearts, that we are to step forward, taking big leaps of faith, and trust Him for something big.

So we prayed, and we lept. That same day I contacted our broker and realtor again and asked them if we could meet to discuss possible options for us. We met with the realtor that week who informed us that we need to be ready for the "long haul" not exactly what we wanted to hear. He said basically with our budget we probably could only find a short sale or foreclosure and that could mean months and months of waiting, and potentially disappointment. Not only that but he said be prepared for a home that could also need a lot of work. Not exactly what we wanted to hear. But we prayed and still had faith to move forward. Fast forward a week later, our realtor calls and says "I found something I think you guys will really love, I think we need to look at it tonight!" We scramble and along with Miya go look at this home. It's not only move in ready, but in the neighborhood we wanted, and the model we were hoping for. That night Lew and I look at our budget again...pray...and leap again. The next night we sign an offer. The next day we are under contract. Yes, all that in 2 weeks.

It's unbelievable to see how God called us to leap in faith, and then literally at record speed he drops something into our laps that we didn't even imagine receiving, or know to ask for. Of course at any point God could take this away, we are awaiting an inspection and appraisal, but we are trusting God will work good regardless of the outcome. We are just praying that He will continue to give us clarity and direction as he has thus far. Our proposed settlement date is December 7th, and we probably won't move in ourselves until after Christmas.

My title is probably confusing now as you hear me describe all these big changes in our lives right now. The bottom line that we are seeing in all this is God's unchanging nature. In the midst of all these twists and turns in our story, God has remained steady. This portion from Morning and Evening pretty much sums it up for me:

“I am the Lord, I change not."
Malachi 3:6

It is well for us that, amidst all the variableness of life, there is One whom change cannot affect; One whose heart can never alter, and on whose brow mutability can make no furrows. All things else have changed—all things are changing. The sun itself grows dim with age; the world is waxing old; the folding up of the worn-out vesture has commenced; the heavens and earth must soon pass away; they shall perish, they shall wax old as doth a garment; but there is One who only hath immortality, of whose years there is no end, and in whose person there is no change. The delight which the mariner feels, when, after having been tossed about for many a day, he steps again upon the solid shore, is the satisfaction of a Christian when, amidst all the changes of this troublous life, he rests the foot of his faith upon this truth—“I am the Lord, I change not.”

The stability which the anchor gives the ship when it has at last obtained a hold-fast, is like that which the Christian’s hope affords him when it fixes itself upon this glorious truth. With God “is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.” Whatever his attributes were of old, they are now; his power, his wisdom, his justice, his truth, are alike unchanged. He has ever been the refuge of his people, their stronghold in the day of trouble, and he is their sure Helper still. He is unchanged in his love. He has loved his people with “an everlasting love”; he loves them now as much as ever he did, and when all earthly things shall have melted in the last conflagration, his love will still wear the dew of its youth. Precious is the assurance that he changes not! The wheel of providence revolves, but its axle is eternal love.

“Death and change are busy ever,

Man decays, and ages move;

But his mercy waneth never;

God is wisdom, God is love.”

Potty update 2

2010-08-30T09:31:00.003-04:00

**Warning! For those not interested in a potty update, you may not want to read ahead. This post contains words like poo poo and poopy more than once. :) **

So, for those who are just dying to know how our "potty" venture is going ;) For the record we haven't officially started potty training yet, but because Miya seems to go number 2 at the same time every day I thought why not just put her on the potty and see what happens. I had tried that around 15 months and she definitely didn't seem ready.

We have the little seat you sit on the top of the regular toilet. I thought I'd give it another shot yesterday. Much to our surprise she actually went! She has also been telling me "poo poo" before she goes which definitely helps.

This morning I tried again after breakfast (which seems to be "the time") and after a minute or 2 she started to say "all done! down down!" but she hadn't gone yet. I kept trying to distract her with books and then finally I remembered yesterday she had only wanted her "peek-a-boo" book. So I quickly ran to get it, and as soon as I gave it to her she went. I told Lew it looks like we will have to keep this one near the potty as her reading material :) Amazing how much of a creature of habit she is.

Then when she was done I got her down and stood her up and soon after noticed a puddle at her feet, looks I need to keep her on for another minute or 2. But I told Lew I will gladly clean up pee pee off of the floor over changing a poopy diaper :)

Not sure if we will really begin to more aggressively potty train yet, but for now I am enjoying one less poopy diaper change a day. We'll see if she continues to seem interested.

Still can't get over how big she is getting. Kind of bitter sweet for sure.

.Wait.

2010-08-30T07:54:00.002-04:00

I feel like we are currently in the "school" of waiting. Waiting for a new job for Lew, waiting to figure out where we are going to live...eventually :)...waiting to decide if we should buy or rent a home...waiting on more children...

I think we are always "waiting" for something. But certain seasons the waiting seems more daunting and wearisome. But in each season I am SO aware of how God's grace carries me through the waiting and how much I am learning in the process. It's so easy to be looking forward to the outcome...the thing we are waiting for. But really it's the process that bears the sweetest fruit. These 2 things encouraged me so much this morning as we continue to wait:

Wait on the Lord. -Psalm 27:14

It may seem an easy thing to wait, but it is one of the postures which a Christian soldier learns not without years of teaching. Marching and quick-marching are much easier to God's warriors than standing still. There are hours of perplexity when the most willing spirit, anxiously desirous to serve the Lord, knows not what part to take. Then what shall it do? Vex itself by despair? Fly back in cowardice, turn to the right hand in fear, or rush forward in presumption? No, but simply wait. Wait in prayer, however. Call upon God, and spread the case before Him; tell Him your difficulty, and plead His promise of aid. In dilemmas between one duty and another, it is sweet to be humble as a child, and wait with simplicity of soul upon the Lord. It is sure to be well with us when we feel and know our own folly, and are heartily willing to be guided by the will of God. But wait in faith. Express your unstaggering confidence in Him; for unfaithful, untrusting waiting, is but an insult to the Lord. Believe that if He keep you tarrying even till midnight, yet He will come at the right time; the vision shall come and shall not tarry. Wait in quiet patience, not rebelling because you are under the affliction, but blessing your God for it. Never murmur against the second cause, as the children of Israel did against Moses; never wish you could go back to the world again, but accept the case as it is, and put it as it stands, simply and with your whole heart, without any self-will, into the hand of your covenant God, saying, "Now, Lord, not my will, but Thine be done. I know not what to do; I am brought to extremities, but I will wait until Thou shalt cleave the floods, or drive back my foes. I will wait, if Thou keep me many a day, for my heart is fixed upon Thee alone, O God, and my spirit waiteth for Thee in the full conviction that Thou wilt yet be my joy and my salvation, my refuge and my strong tower."

And one more from a friends blog

“…waiting is living through those moments when you do not understand what God is doing and you have no power to change your circumstances for the better…So much of our daily comfort comes from the fact that we are able to make sense of our circumstances… Waiting is hard for us because we tie our hearts to other glories. We so often live for the glory of human acceptance, of personal achievement, of power and position, of possessions and places, and of comfort and pleasure. So when God’s glory requires that these things be withheld from us – things we look to for identity, meaning, and purpose – we find waiting a grueling, burdensome experience. Waiting means surrendering your glory. Waiting means submitting to His glory. Waiting means understanding that you were given life and breath for the glory of another. Waiting gives you opportunity to forsake the delusion of you own glory and rest in the God of awesome glory. Only when you do that will you find what you seek, and what you were meant to have: lasting identity, meaning and purpose, and peace in Christ…”

Big first...

2010-08-29T09:33:00.001-04:00

Well folks...today is a momentous occasion! Yes it is the day of my birth, but not only that! Miya at 17 months did her first "number 2" on the potty. We cheered and celebrated and she just looked at us like we were crazy. Not sure she gets why we were so excited, but it's a start!

Our little girl is growing up :)

Ministry of Motherhood

2010-08-22T16:08:00.003-04:00

My prayer as a Mommy...

"Choosing to be a servant-mother means willingly giving up myself, my expectations, and my time to the task of mothering; and choosing to believe that doing so is the best use of my time at the moment. It means that, by faith, I have already made a decision to make myself available in the routine tasks and myriad of interruptions of my daily life because I believe it is God's will for me to serve my family through them."

Sally Clarkson
The Ministry of Motherhood

Growing...

2010-08-17T14:52:00.006-04:00

{some pictures from our recent beach trip}

Life is busy (what's new!) but Miya is growing and changing at such a rapid rate, I can't help but pause and make a few notes. I realize how quickly I forget to notice all the fun little things our girly is learning. She is almost 17months old and I can't help but ask the cliche question "where did the time go!?"

A few fun "miya-isms"

Shishy (still her fav snack)
Moooooowa (looooong O with a very high pitch squeak and a slightly British twang) = more
Hi Momma, hi! She likes to start with hi and end with hi (same for bye bye)
Awww bebe: I must say this and not realize it, but she says with little babies and dogs alike :)
I-lu-youuuuu: She points to her eyes, then her heart, then at the other person (usually the dogs!)
ah-dun= all done. She def tells us when she doesn't like something or when she has had enough
no no no noooooo: usually she says it to herself after she has done something naughty
hoisy (usually followed by a nay nay): horses seem to be one of her favorite animals currently
Roooooar: most animals if you ask what sound they make she will reply with a roar. Close enough I suppose :)
Shea=hair. She has a fascination for those teeny curls on her head
Owe-side=outside (your fav place to be)
Shoose=shoes (still your fav accessory)
Mwah!= her sound for kisses

Other fun things

You wave with the cutest little floppy wrist ever.

You love to say hi and bye bye to inanimate objects, and you do so with such enthusiasm (this includes saying bye bye to your crib when you wake up in the morning or from naps)

You love to hug and kiss all babies and all children for that matter. Have had a few awkward moments in public when you run up to kids you don't know and try to kiss them...on the lips!

You still amaze me with your sleep habits, sometimes 13 hours at night and then a 2-4 hour nap during the day. I am now convinced no sibling of yours will ever be able to spoil us as you have.

You love people and love being out and about where you can people watch. you love to wave to random strangers and get their attention, but when they try to approach you all the sudden you are overcome with shyness :)

You continue with your growling to sleep and when waking up. We know you are getting sleepy when you start growling, and know your waking up the same way.

You like to "hug" by bowing your head and nestling up to someone (or something) :) You usually also include a few "awww bebe" or "awwww papa" with your hugs. It melts my heart.

You have become very fascinated with "baybees" and tend to think any child your size or smaller is a baby...even though they almost always are older than you!
A family update
Things are going well. We are still living with my parents and overwhelmed with thankfulness to them for bearing with us and allowing us to really tackle debt and savings. We still aren't clear on what the best next step is (renting -vs- buying) but trusting God has a good plan. Lew continues to look for work and I am currently working nights at Shady Grove Hospital and loving it. God has continued to provide in amazing ways and we are truly blown away. More than anything I have learned to enjoy the simple things. Yes, I miss having my "own" home, and I miss all the joys that come with that, but I have learned that home is what you make it. It's more than a physical space to call "yours". It's been such a joy living with my parents, that's 4 generations under one roof! Miya loves getting to see her grand grandma, aunt "roo roo", Meema, and pop pop on a daily basis. And honestly I think it's going to be hard to transition once we move out because she is so used to being surrounded by family. But for now we are enjoying where God has us, seeking to enjoy His many gifts and not be anxious about where we will be 6months to a year from now. God has always been faithful!

words.

2010-05-24T15:47:00.003-04:00

Miya is saying a lot of fun stuff right now. Just want to remember them...

Bop Pop = pop pop
Shhhhoe (extra emphasis on the shhhh)
Doe = dog
dock = duck
Oushie = ouchie
dack dack = quauck quack
didda = Auntie rissa
chichen = chicken
mowa = more
aaah-boo = peek-a-boo (the cutest part is she covers and uncovers her ears instead of her eyes :)
uh-oh
aahble = apple
nah-nah = night night
nammy = lamby (her favorite night time snuggle friend)
nus = nose
luh-you = pretty sure this one is love you :)
baw = ball

Walking?

2010-05-24T15:18:00.005-04:00

I have been asked a lot lately if Miya is walking, and my answer has been "sorta". She never seems to just "jump right in" when it comes to new stuff. Especially new stuff that requires work. Even when it came to crawling she went from "scooching" to army crawling, and finally full crawling around 10 months. I think she likes to ease into transition. So, when it comes to walking, she seems to be following that same trend. Around 10 months she started happily cruising. Then 11 months happily cruising one handed. Then 11 1/2 months walking with her little fun walker. Then 12 months happily walking around holding mom or dad's hands. Now at 13 months she is happily walking still hanging on to Mom and Dad's one finger. Yes you read that right. She will walk and walk and walk, but the one catch is she insists on hanging on to just one finger :) It's her last crutch. If we try to pry our finger away she will just crumble. It's pretty hilarious because she has all the mechanics down, but she is erring on the side of caution for now. She did get brave enough to take a few steps on her own, which resulted in a nose dive, resulting in her first big boo-boo. So for now, caution is fine with me!

Here are a few videos of her in action. I call this first one "I don't wanna!" She doesn't like to be told what to do :)

Here is another short one without her crying at the same time:

a few more for fun (one is her dancing)

Let Me Hold You Longer

2010-05-24T15:01:00.006-04:00

Lew got me this book for Mother's Day called "Let Me Hold You Longer' by Karen Kingsbury. What a gem. I can't read it without getting emotional.

Here are a few little excerpts:

"Long ago you came to me,
a miracle of firsts:
First smiles and teeth and baby steps,
a sunbeam on the burst.
But one day you will move away
and leave to me your past,
And I will be left thinking of
a lifetime of your lasts...

The last time I held a bottle
to your baby lips.
The last time I lifted you
and held you on my hip

The last time when you woke up crying,
needing to be walked,
When you last crawled up with your blanket,
wanting to be rocked.

The last time you ran to me ,
still small enough to hold....
Precious, simple moments and
bright flashes from your past--
Would I have held you longer if
I'd known they were your last?...

the last page says:
Let me hold on longer Lord to every precious last!

Trying to enjoy every moment with this little sweety.

Because she has gone SO fast from this to this

ONE

2010-03-30T15:28:00.002-04:00

I'm not going to do what I always do...what is that you may ask? I am not going to start this blog post apologizing along with saying "what a bad blogger I have become!" and I am not going to make any vain promises to be faithful to blog more often. As I have proven time and time again....that may not happen :) Life is full, full to the brim.

I actually have missed blogging, it's just that usually when I sit down to start typing, my brain conks out, and there are just no words left to describe this life of ours...at least no interesting ones! In all honesty I am sorry I don't blog more often, I enjoy looking back on what life has looked like in the past, but for now my memories will have to do!

Either way, as you can tell from the title, our baby is ONE! Yesterday was the big day and I can't believe it's true. I remember a friend (actually several) saying "don't blink, one year will be here before you know it!" and that has become a reality. In a blink my baby went from newborn to little girl. The transformation is astounding. I look at her today and no longer see the wrinkly, tiny, squeaky baby girl we brought home a year ago. Today I see a little girl gaining independence. I see her long curls around her ears where there used to be soft wisps of hair. I see chubby little thighs (that started off as little twigs!) that carry her little body as she attempts to take steps. And I see a little girl who has become determined on mastering the skill of getting her own way (nothing new there).

What a delight it is to see her grow and discover the world. Truly, I believe, one of God's greatest gifts. With her life is very full, but full in the best possible way. I have had to remind myself (often) as I am chasing her while she is getting into things she shouldn't be, or when she is crying for "momma momma" because she doesn't want to take a nap that these are GIFTS; and I am keenly aware of how blessed I am to have the pleasure of chasing my curious girl around, and hearing her utter the sweetest words "momma". I have seen others Mom's walk through unimaginable grief and sorrow ... and have learned to never take for granted the everyday gift of holding your little one close and watching them grow.

So Miya is one! It's been an amazing journey. She keeps us busy these days, now getting into everything. She also is all about copying us these days, whether it's facial expressions, or phrases, she likes to try to repeat. It's so cute to see her mimic us, but it also makes us very aware of what we say and how we say it!

We are having a party on Saturday to celebrate her first year! I can't wait. And to make it even better Nana, Grandpop Lewis, and Auntie Cherai are coming! I will post pictures after the party.

Giveaway

2010-01-19T19:06:00.002-05:00

I found out about this great Store called Downeast Basics from my sister-in-law Rachel and I love it! They have tons of cute modest clothing for woman at great prices. There is a blog doing a giveaway right now so check it out at Second Time Around:

Second Time Around

:Settling:

2010-01-08T08:49:00.003-05:00

The Holidays are over and things are finally settling down. We had a great visit in Indiana with the Lewis family for Christmas! We drove there, and the drive was so much better than I anticipated. Miya slept most of the way both ways and we really didn't have to stop too often. That was a HUGE answer to prayer. You can see pictures from our trip Here.

Miya is growing in leaps and bounds. On the 29th she turned 9 months, and I still can't get over how close we are getting to one year. When we got back from Indiana we had about 3 days to pack up our apartment and move out. It was a very challenging couple days because Miya was a little out of sorts from teething and all the changes. But thanks to my parents and family we were able to get everything together and finally are getting settled at our parents. Right now we don't know how long we are going to be here. We are praying about what the next year might look like, but for right now the goal is to save and get out of as much debt as we can. Lew is looking for another job currently and we are praying for clarity on that as well. I also may be returning to work in the hospital part time, but I will find out more about that next week.

New things in Miya world:
Food: I can't believe how this girl eats. I seriously have never seen such a thing in my life. She sits down to eat and it's like she is eating a rare delicacy. It could be anything from banana to plain cheese, or fish, or just plain old wheat bread (which she happens to adore) this girl eats and eats and eats. And not only does she eat, but she makes the most hilarious noises I have ever heard. This video is about a month old, she has gotten louder, but this is just a glimpse into how she eats these days.

Other fun stuff: She is still doing her army crawl. She scoots all around to get what she wants. She seems to show no interest in crawling on all 4's, although she does get up and rock on all fours. She is very interested in pulling up and standing. She likes to hold onto things and tries to take steps. Mommy isn't quite as fearless as she is, a few times she has decided just to let her self go just to see how quick I am. Thankfully I have caught her, but talk about giving Mommy a heart attack! It's so fun watching her grow. She also loves my parents dogs. Every time she sees them she starts yelling "doodie" that happens to be her word for dog. Right now she says Momma, Dada, and Doodie. And a few other words that I can't quite comprehend. Physical therapy is going well. We are down to every other week and Miya's neck is straight and the weaker side has strengthened dramatically. Right now our main area of focus is core strength. She gets to do all kinds of baby pilates such as the wheelbarrow walk and the plank. Mommy does them with her :)

Life is sweet. We are very much enjoying watching her grow, and spending time with my family. That's it for now!

8 months...35 weeks :)

2009-12-01T09:29:00.003-05:00

Miya turned 8 months old on the 29th, and I can't believe how time has flown by. I look at her and am amazed by how she is growing and changing. She is up on all fours attempting to crawl, but it looks more like she is doing the "worm". She almost does belly flops as she attempts to propel herself forward. She is definitely getting more proficient in being up on all fours, so I think it's only a matter of time before she is all over the place! (which I will still admit I am in no hurry for!)

She also is all about fingerfoods these days. She has never been a fan of purees even from the beginning, which has made starting solids interesting! She wants everything we eat and she is a very...enthusiastic eater :) As soon as we sit her in her highchair she screams demanding food, and when the food is gone she cries hysterically as if the world has come to an end, yes that is our drama queen! She still has no teeth, but gums everything! She has eagerly eaten everything we have given her, which has been a big surprise. She even likes things we eat...like lentil casserole! She loves her food.

She loves getting out, it's so funny to watch her excitement as we leave our place and head out for a walk or to visit friends, seriously this girl is so content to just be out the house no matter where we go! She is a big fan of the grocery store too.

I was laughing when I got an email that said "your 35 week old" I thought "wow it's been so long since I marked Miya's age by weeks!". And I realized that in a few weeks Miya will have been in our world longer than she was in my belly. I just can't get over how quickly time is passing, and I can honestly say it is such a joy watching her grow before our eyes!

Our girl on thanksgiving...

Silly girl looked up at me right as we were taking it, it's very hard to get a picture with all of us looking at the camera anymore!

For Nana and Grandpop...

2009-11-23T20:16:00.004-05:00

Miya opening her book from nana and grandpop! She loved hearing your voices :) Don't worry about all her fussing, she gets upset when she is forced to sit still for too long, but she loves it! We read the story (actually you read it :)) over 3 times before bed and she giggled and squealed each time.

And Miya reunites with her paci. It was hilarious, she found one of her old paci's (which she has not taken for many many months!) and she popped it in as if she had never been apart from it! But then she finds all kinds of other things to do with is :) She is such a silly girl! When she is older we can't wait to share the love hate relationship we had with her paci in those early days!!

A little glimpse...

2009-11-22T09:00:00.004-05:00

...Into how fun a day with Miya can be :)

Sometimes she likes to laugh...just because :) And it makes me smile, even when it means she is way too wired before bedtime!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes...

2009-11-18T07:14:00.002-05:00

Wow does this blog ever need an update! I have wondered how and when I would resurrect this blog, and I guess now that we have so much going on, this would be the perfect time! I love blogging, mainly because it's fun to go back and read through all that was going on in our lives in a particular season, but I also despise the time it takes to upload pictures etc... So I will admit I have been mostly micro-blogging on Facebook and posting pictures there (because it really only takes a minute!)

But here is a mini update of sorts!

Baby girl is...ready for this?...almost 8 months! Talk about time flying by. I still can't get over that, I really feel like we just brought her home from the hospital. But she is growing in leaps and bounds. She is starting to repeat sounds and sometimes words, but she definitely is coming up with her own little language. You know the kind that only Mommies understand? :) The other day she was watching Baby Einstein with me and they were showing all the animals and saying their names and Miya was just in her own little world and all the sudden goes "doooog" I was shocked because it was right after they had said "dog" on the video! Amazing how their little brains work. She says lots of Dada, still waiting for that consistent "Mama" she has said it but I think it was more an accident. She is getting mobile which I am so thankful for, now that she can scooch/crawl around more she tends to be more occupied because she can explore a little more. I might not be so thankful when she starts getting into stuff she isn't supposed to..but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it :)

She has been working on the same 2 teeth forever now. I don't know if we will believe it when they finally pop through. They have always looked like they are on the verge, and she sure acts like they are hurting her, but no pearly whites yet. I have a feeling they will come soon though. She just got over her first big virus. We ended up at the ER because she was wheezing and coughing pretty bad. Thankfully after 2 weeks it is mostly gone and now we are just dealing with the teething. Miya is still doing her Physical Therapy for torticollis. For those of you who don't know, because of Miya's position in utero her head was tilted slightly to one side and as a result she has weakened muscles on one side of her neck causing a tilt. Her's is very mild (not noticeable to most people) but the Physical Therapist describes it at very stubborn. We have been going once a week for about 3-4 months now....and hopefully will be able to cut down on that soon.

And like I said, I hate uploading photos here...so here is a link to our Facebook album of Miya for the last few months:
Family Photos
7 Months
6 Months

Another BIG change is we are moving! I still can't believe it (as it's only been a few days since we made the big decision) but before the new year we will no longer be in our apartment! My Parents have so generously offered for us to live with them for 8-12 months to allow us to save up/pay off debt in order to be able to own a home. I am so thankful for their kindness to us. We have been meeting with a financial counselor at our church and he has been telling us that we can survive the way we are going now, but if we really want to make progress towards buying a home, we really need to take drastic steps. In all honesty we are more excited than anything. We will be living in the home I grew up in, so for me it feels like home! It will be so great to be able to save more and make a dent on some of our debt. Plus to have help with Miya will be so great! Originally we were going to have to pay to get out of our lease. In the long run we knew it made sense to pay to get out of our lease, because we would be paying 1,000 to break our lease which would save us up to 12 thousand since we wouldn't have a rent payment anymore. But here is where I clearly see God's hand in all of this. A few days ago a good friend of mine, Rachel, asked if she can stop by with a friend of hers for a visit. They are both moms as well and so it's always nice to have Moms stop by with their kiddos. Anyways I met her friend Jen and we got to talking. She mentioned she moved to this area from Kentucky because her husband found a job in the area. She has been living with Rachel because they are trying to save money and find a place to live. She mentioned she had been looking at our apartment complex (in fact she really wanted the exact unit we have) but has been told that they don't have any openings right now. As soon as she said it I was shocked. I explained to her that we are actually going to be moving out, and she just looked at me in disbelief! Our time lines exactly line up in that we want to move out before the first of January and they want to move in January. So, we call our leasing office to ask if they would allow us to turn our contract over to Jen since they could move in right away and were shocked by their response. They don't allow people to sub-lease, but because we have a replacement they will wave our fee and give us back our deposit. We are both so overjoyed because it's so clear God has opened this door for us, but not only that, in us moving God is providing a place for this nice family to live! It just blows me away. So, now we have a lot of packing to do, on top of getting ready for the holidays...but we are very excited for our transition!

Also this Christmas we will be taking our first big road trip with Miya! We are going to Indiana to be with the Lewis' and couldn't be more excited. We are planning to leave and drive through the night, hoping Miya will sleep most of the way! I will let you know how that goes :)

I think that is a sufficient update for now :) If you have even read this far! I have never been good at keeping things short!

Letter to Miya...

2009-08-22T21:50:00.000-04:00

I have been wanting to do this for, well, over 4 months! I had a "goal" to try to write Miya a letter each month to recap the month before, and here we are, Miya is 4 months and 3 weeks today, and not one letter! I have a lot of catching up to do. So, I am going to start now and try to catch up one letter at a time! I am doing this more for me to remember. But also to show Miya what her first 4 months of life looked like! See, the nostalgia never ends...I thought it was a pregnancy thing, but it looks like it's a Mommy thing too :)

My sweet girlie,

How can it be that you are almost 5 months old? The day that I held you as a sweet newborn for the first time seems so far behind us. Life is so full with you and the days go fast. Sometimes I wish I could freeze time for just a moment, I don't want the time to fly as it does and don't want to miss a thing! But I can't freeze time (as much as I try) so your Daddy and I just enjoy every moment with you. I love seeing you explore and be in awe of the world around you. The noises, the colors, the smells, you inspire me to be in awe with you. Sweet girl you make your Father and I feel so rich. So here is my best attempt at a recap of the last 4 months. So much has happened in such a short amount of time, and I can't imagine what the next 4 months will look like.

Month One...

In month one we began the adventure of being your Mommy and Daddy, and it was just that, and adventure! The days in the hospital still seem like a blur. I remember I got about 3 hours of sleep a night because all I wanted to do was stare at you and watch you sleep. Daddy would laugh at me because for the first month I wanted to be everywhere you were. I remember the nurse came to take you to the nursery to give you a bath; after you had been gone for about 2 minutes we tracked you down and insisted on being a part of your bath. I missed you too much to be apart from you, I mean I did wait 9 months to meet you (not to mention the 48 hours of labor!)

When we brought you home I remember thinking, wait it's just us now, what do we do!? I then began to wish I had taken advantage of the opportunity to sleep while in the hospital! The sleep deprevation began to set in, and whew what a funny place to be. I think no sleep just makes you feel like time is standing still. The days seem long and the nights seem even longer! I remember feeling so fearful at night when the sun went down and I knew that I wouldn't be getting a full nights rest, in fact I now know something I was not aware of before I had you: I NEED sleep, I LOVE sleep, sleep has become a dear dear friend that I am very thankful for! Amazingly you never had day/night confusion which I am very thankful for. You meant business when it came to sleep so you went down and slept for 3-4 hours at a time at night occasionally throwing a 5 hour stretch in there. In fact on the first day of week 4 you went 6 whole hours! I almost went crazy wondering if you were ok! Yes that's right I woke up several times wondering why I hadn't heard you screaming to be fed yet :)

You slept a lot in the beginning. People would visit and many would ask "is it normal for a newborn to sleep this much!?" Well it was for you! You ate, slept, and slept some more your first entire month. I would sometimes forget you were there because you would just sleep so peacefully in your little seat in the living room. You never made a peep until it was time to eat, and than you would sound your alarm! I kid you not you have the strongest set of lungs I have EVER heard. When you wanted your voice to be heard you had no problem making that happen. We would kid and say you have 3 volumes: loud, louder, and loudest. We hardly ever needed a monitor to hear you.

It was in your 4th week that you began to make your presence known. This was the point when we began to call you (yes you my dear!) a fussy girl. You began to become very picky about, how you were held, when you were held, where you would sleep, when you would sleep, how you would eat, when you would eat, what noises you would hear, etc.... Daddy and I would just look at each other and say "what now? We fed her, changed her, she's is probably tired but won't sleep! What do we do!!?" We spent many weeks trying to "figure you out." Of course "nurse" Mommy would try to figure out the medical reasons for your crying. "It must be reflux!" "It must be gas." "She must have a dairy sensitivity." "Maybe she's sick!?" So many possibilities to fret over. Dear girl, I hope you will respond differently one day if God gives you a child of your own. Your Momma responded in fear so many times, that first month was so scary and God taught me SO much about what it looks like to really depend on Him.

That first month was so sweet. I loved to just stare at you and try to comprehend that you were our gift from God. We had the joy of getting to care for you and watch you grow! And grow you did :) You gained so much weight that first four weeks! By 4 weeks you were close to 10 pounds. You had gone way up from your 6lb 8oz birth weight. It was probably because Mommy fed you every time you cried. What can I say, I didn't know what else to do.

Month one also meant LOTS of fun visitors! People came far and wide to meet you. Here are some of those people:

Grandma and Granddad Lewis :)

Uncle Enoch

Aunt Hannah

Meema and Pop Pop

Uncle Sam and Uncle Jeremy (Aunt Pri came too but I somehow didn't get a picture!)

Aunt Rachel. She even stayed in the hospital with Mommy overnight so Daddy could go home and get some rest :)

Aunt Rissa and Tommy

The Remmy's and "meeper" their baby girl who you will meet in November! I am hoping you will be good friends growing up.

Auntie Cherai made a special visit from Chicago to see you!

Jessica from the small group Daddy and Mommy lead

Jeannine also from small group

Mandy also from small group. Did I mention all these fine people brought us food too! :)

Mark and Brandy are very good friends of ours

They are expecting their second baby in January and we are pretty sure it's a girl! Another girl we hope you get to be good friends with.

Mark and Brandy's cutie pie Matthan. We are hoping he will protect you as you grow up, since you don't have a big brother!

Great Grandma Kouneski.

Mommy's good friend Kelly

Dustin from small group. You were the first baby he ever held!

May also from small group :)

Good friends Mari and Dave :) We just found out they are moving across the street from us and we are so excited!

I know more people visited but these are all the pictures I could dig up for now. That is my best summary of your first month. It is hard to believe you are no longer a newborn. But you still are our cuddly girl, who loves to be held and snuggled. And we are so very thankful for that!

Love
Mommy

Coming up next: 2 month letter...

Seriously...

2009-08-05T16:24:00.003-04:00

Seriously yummy.
Seriously easy.... cupcakes.

Made these this morning for Mama's birthday and they were good, and lovely! It's my new favorite cupcake recipe.

:o) Thanks Joy the baker, you're the best!

Domesticity Strikes

2009-07-20T08:44:00.005-04:00

I am trying to get back into my domestic groove. I think I have had plenty of excuses after having a baby: "I'm too tired", "Shower -vs- cooking dinner...no competition", and just feeling tired after caring for a baby and feeling NO drive to make a meal, or do anything creative in the home for that matter.

So after a vacation and now that Miya is getting to be a little more independent I have gotten my mojo back, or at least part of my mojo. I think one can only tolerate frozen trader joe's meals for so long (they are good, but can't replace home cooked meals.) So I planned my first week of meals and did my foodshopping and am on a roll. I planned many meals from The Pioneer Woman and it felt good to be working in the kitchen again. Also now that Miya seems to be tolerating dairy again (praise the Lord!) I feel like it's easier to plan normal meals now. Next time you see me I may be a whole 20 pounds heavier because I am making up for lost time with my beloved friends cheese and ice cream :) I can't get enough! Here are a few recent discovers that have been keeping me busy:

Easy homemade Artisan Bread

I found this great way to make bread that is seriously NO FUSS! I love my bread maker and still use it for a lot of different stuff, but I love artisan bread and you can't really get that from the bread maker. I found this great Instructable online that comes from the book "Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day". It is seriously some good stuff. Basically you follow the instructions and make a batch of dough that doesn't even need to be kneaded. Store it in the fridge for up to 2 weeks and grab a ball when you need for loaves of bread, pizza crust, or rolls. You can get creative and make a round loaf or a baguette. She includes videos with instructions on how to prepare and cook the dough. You can use it to accompany meals or use for sandwiches.

If you don't think you can use it in 2 weeks you can parbake (bake 90% of the way) and then freeze it like that and bake the rest of the way when it thaws. I also halved the recipe as is suggested in order to have room to store it in the fridge and since I don't think I could use the whole batch from the original recipe. The dough develops a nice sourdough flavor after a few days...Mmmmm.

Another of my favorite blogs is Simple Mom. She posted this link in her weekend links: "20 Tips to Waste Less Food" from Small notebook. This was so helpful as I am still trying to learn how to not waste food! She has so many great pointers and you can find even more helpful tips in the comments section. My favorite was freezing fresh lemon or lime juice in ice cube trays so you can use it for recipes when you need it. She also mentions freezing leftover wine in ice cube trays for soups and or sauces. Such a great idea.

If you need some fresh inspiration check out Simple Mom, she is doing a whole series on Homemaking called Back to the Basics!

More on life soon...

living life

2009-07-20T08:36:00.003-04:00

So, obviously there hasn't been much blogging going on! I think (especially with a baby) we have just been living life and haven't had so much time to blog about it. Life is good, we have so much to be thankful for. Our little girl is growing up (she is 16 weeks!) and time is just flying by. Lew and I keep finding ourselves sighing before bed saying things like: "before we know she will be potty training!" It just blows me away how she is literally changing before our eyes. Growing in leaps and bounds and learning so much. I am enjoying every moment, watching her discover the world fills me with awe and makes me want to discover things all over again. It's amazing how babies and children are captivated by the little things, like a red speck on the carpet, or a mirror showing their own reflection. It makes you think about how we are called to be like children, life comes down to the little things sometimes.

Either way I have many things I have been wanting to post. We just got back from the beach and had a great time. It's good to be home again, but we are missing all the company of my family too! We also had a great visit from the Lewis Grandparents and Aunt Cherai. It's hard to believe the summer is halfway over. More to come...

::Work::

2009-06-23T08:40:00.002-04:00

It's hard to believe I have been home with Miya for close to 3 months now. Each month has looked very different from the last. The first month was the hardest in terms of adjusting to the new job as Mommy, but also the funnest because I just couldn't get over the fact that little Miya was ours and how much I loved her! Then the second was the most challenging because Miya's fussiness really peaked at that point and I felt so discouraged as I tried to care for her with no reciprocation and no clue what was causing the fussiness! The third month has been trying in terms of figuring out how to balance the role of both Mommy and wife. Now that being a Mom isn't quite so "new" (and I am getting more sleep at night ;)) I can tend to battle with how to juggle the new with the old. But by God's grace I am learning. Then to throw one more factor into the mix I will be going back to work more than likely 2 half days a week, which will be another big adjustment. Thankfully it doesn't take much to keep my license, but I have to admit the idea of leaving miya for even just a few hours a week is a sad one for me, I LOVE getting to spend my days with her! But I know this is just a season and eventually I will be looking into a different nursing position where I can perhaps work one shift every other week in the evening so Lew can watch her and I can still be with her during the day.

Something God has been reminding me lately is that even though I am staying at home, being a mommy to Miya and wife to Lew is my job, and it's by no means an easy one (even though I enjoy it so!) I sometimes forget that it's a job, but it is, and it's the job God has ordained for me! I was reading this excerpt from Keep a Quiet Heart from Elisabeth Elliot and it really encouraged me:

Wouldn't it make and astounding difference, not only in the quality of the work we do (in office, schoolroom, factory, kitchen, or backyard), but also in our satisfaction, even our joy, if we recognized God's gracious gift in every single task, from making a bed or bathing a baby to drawing a blueprint or selling a computer? If our children saw us doing "heartily as unto the Lord" all the work we do, they would learn true happiness. Instead of feeling that they must be allowed to do what they like, they would learn to like what they do.

St. Ignatius Loyola prayed, "Teach us, Good Lord, to labor and to ask for no reward save that of knowing that we do Thy will." As I learn to pray that prayer, I find that there are many more rewards that come along as fringe benefits. As we make an offering of our work, we find the truth of a principle Jesus taught: Fulfillment is not a goal to achieve, but always the by-product of sacrifice.

That last line is the one I want to remember, in fact I may post it in Miya's nursery so I see it when she decides to wake up at 3am to eat (a habit she had cut out but has now decided to reintroduce, fun times!) I can get so caught up in the busyness and can tend to only see the ordinary mundane tasks...but I forget how spectacular it is that I get to be this sweet girls Mommy, and that I get to have this loving man as my husband. I can be so blind sometimes to how TRULY blessed I am. I really want to grow in laying down my life for these 2 God has given as my family so I can know true fulfillment! I am quickly learning that there is no fulfillment in living for yourself.

The Good Stuff

2009-06-19T07:21:00.002-04:00

I don't know how many of you read the Simple Mom blog (it's one of my favorites), but I read this on there this morning and boy did it make me think! Mommies if you haven't read her blog before you should check it out! :)

(taken from simplemom.net)

A few years ago, I read this excerpt from one of Erma Bombeck’s columns, when she discovered she was dying from cancer — it was titled “If I Had to Live My Life Over”:

“… I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage. I would have talked less and listened more. I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded. I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace. … I would have sat on the lawn with my kids, even if it meant grass stains.”

It hit home. As I write this, I’m looking at a bottle of perfume — one that I love — that was a Mother’s Day gift in 2005. I’ve used about a quarter of it. I’m not sure if I’m waiting for the queen to visit, an invitation to the presidential inauguration ball, or just some amazingly romantic date with my husband. But for some reason, I hesitate to use it, as though it’s a precious commodity; that once it’s gone, it’s gone.

That’s true, to some degree. But I can just get more perfume, probably as another Mother’s Day gift. If I love it so much, why don’t I just use it?

Do you have something in your life akin to this? For your wedding, did you register for special china in addition to your everyday dishes? How about certain lotions, or soaps, or articles of clothing? Do you have eleven categories of towel types, like Monica does in Friends?

Maybe you’re in the depths of early childhood rearing, like me. You’re up to your elbows in poop and snot, and you lost count the amount of times you’ve picked up the same blocks off the same carpet. Your day is peppered with breakfast, lunch, dinner, nap times, quiet times, time outs, and story time. If you hear Dora’s map yell “I’m the map!” one more time, you might scream.

The liturgy of our day’s everydayness can be numbing. It’s easy to forget about that good perfume, the bone china, the silk skirt. There’s spit-up to contend with.

Make this season of your life — whatever it is — more special with those special things you’re saving. Break out the good china for tonight’s homemade pizza. Let your kids know they’re special with those special little things, and don’t worry so much about the messes they’ll make. Bring out the “fancy guest” towels for your family. You’ll blink, and this season will be gone. That pudgy hand covered in dirt will soon be holding hands in a waltz with her groom.

Enjoy the little things in life. And make them more special by using the good stuff. Don’t wait for that perfect moment — it’s right here.

What “thing” are you saving for something special?

11 weeks and so behind!

2009-06-17T11:25:00.004-04:00

Wow this blog has not only been neglected...but I have been looking back and it's become all about Miya! What can we say, she is much cuter and much more interesting than we are.
Also posting pictures on facebook is SOO much easier and faster so I have been doing that more, just to save time. We also are using shutterfly to post pictures. You can see them here.

I can't get over the fact that she is 11 1/2 weeks. Seriously, people said it would go "fast" but this is much faster than I expected! We have been through such a journey, learning to be her Mommy and Daddy and learning to not trust in our own strength while we do it. It's amazing to watch our little girl grow, and see her changing and learning new things right before our eyes. Since she has been babbling away I find that I can just sit and watch her and listen to her forever! Just this week she has started to enjoy a little bit of independent play, which is such a nice break for me. I lay her on her little play mat which has a mirror over it, and she will just lay there and coo/babble/smile/laugh, all while she kicks her little feet wildly. It's just precious. She also has started to spend a little time in her bumbo seat which is really funny.

She starts off doing good, using those neck muscles..and will stay that way for a good while...

Then she starts to recline...and looks something like this. It cracks me up every time. Don't you just love her little "kisser?"

weeee!

looking at me like I am crazy!

haha silly mommy.

trying on her bikini that she borrowed from her cousin, although daddy has decided his little girl will not wear a bikini at the beach!

smiles..

again, I love her little kisser :)

We are enjoying our girl so much. She has started to really grow out of the "fussies" and we are so glad! We actually saw a GI doctor this past week and she confirmed that she is sensitive to not only dairy in my diet, but soy as well. So that has been a huge adjustment for me as they are both in pretty much everything. We have seen a huge difference as I have cut them out, so it's worth the sacrifice. But I must say as soon as I am able (maybe when she is around 6 months) I am going to get myself a HUGE milkshake. We are hoping she does grow out of it.

It's been such a joy to watch her discover the world, she is very attentive to noises and lots of things catch her attention. The other day we were walking outside and she heard a bird chirping and turned in that direction just memorized by the bird. It was too cute. She also LOVES music, in specific we have this childrens CD that has 150 kids songs, sung by children, and she just loves it. It has been a life saver in the care as she usually screams whenever in her carseat, but yesterday I turned it on and she stopped, and even fell asleep! The only problem is I can't get these songs out of my head! I still have the words to muffin man and billy boy running through my mind :o)

She also has started to LOVE her bath time, so we now give her a bath every night! The only issue we have been running into is getting her to not go potty in the bath...we're working on it.

Our girl also has started to teethe. Thankfully it's off and on, but my pediatrician said she wouldn't be surprised if she cuts her teeth early, especially because I did. Miya is growing up WAY too fast! But we are enjoying every minute of it.

Well, I guess that is life for now! The Lewis Grandparents and Auntie Cherai are coming for a visit soon, and we can't wait for them to see Miya as she has changed a lot since the last time they saw her!

She survived...

2009-06-01T17:40:00.003-04:00

...her first shots! But what a traumatic experience for her and us! She had a pretty bad reaction to the vaccines that lasted almost 24 hours. But all is well again and this video proves it. I am just loving all her smiles and talking :)

7 weeks, and growing :)

2009-05-17T19:05:00.006-04:00

Long time no blog :) I know I kind of left you all hanging after my last dramatic post at 5 weeks! Sorry about that. Life has been full to the brim with our girlie. How about an update?

Things seem to be improving with Miya in terms of the fussiness (we are so thankful) and just taking it one day at a time. With many peoples advice and tips (thanks everyone!) we were able to implement some soothing techniques that really seem to calm miya when she hits the "witching hour" as we have grown to call it. It usually hits around 5 and lasts until she finally conks out around 9ish. She pretty much fights sleep the entire time and we have tried everything to get her to settle during this time. Usually she is ok with being held but really doesn't want to be put down, actually that is true of her most of the day. This evening time fussiness is usually the hardest part of the day and once she finally goes to sleep we are ready for bed too (it wears us out) We still aren't sure if this is officially colic, because she has stopped having the long crying spells (seems like they left as quick as they came) but one HUGE discovery was simply the fact that our girl gets VERY easily overstimulated and needs to nap frequently. She tends to wake up, eat right away, have about 30-45 minutes of awake time and then it's back to bed! One thing we realized is we were keeping her awake way too long, and way past her point of exhaustion. I had no idea babies this age need so much sleep...oops :) So much of her fussiness was us not picking up on her sleepy cues and what we learned is that once she becomes overtired, she is almost impossible to calm down at that point. So I have started learning her cues and watching for her getting tired and putting her right down to sleep, and amazingly she seems to be happier and calmer now! Don't get me wrong, she is still a little "diva" of sorts when it comes to making her preferences known (and trust me the girl knows what she wants!) but she seems to be easier to calm and sleeps better now, which has been great! Speaking of sleep....

Miya is finally in her crib full time! We couldn't believe how quickly and smoothly the transition took place. We started Tuesday night this week after a really bad failed attempt last week. I was afraid that putting her in the crib after she had gotten so snug in our bed would be horrible, but it wasn't! We started with naps first, then at night. I think the transition was harder on me than it was for her. I would make several trips (and still do) to peek in her room before I fall asleep. What really has helped is trying to give her a little routine that fits in with her sleep. So basically trying to be consistent so she knows what is coming next. So when she wakes I open her blinds, feed her, then change her diaper, then spend some "awake" time with her enjoying all the smiles she is starting to give us, then I basically watch for the yawing to start. Then it's right back to her room, close the blinds, turn on the noise maker (which seems to work like magic for her, but only on the rain setting) rock her for a minute, sing a song, then lay her down. The only hiccup we have hit is the whole pacifier ordeal. Our girl is totally hooked on her paci for sleep. How can something do so much good and so much evil all at the same time? :) Basically sucking on it is the one thing that soothes her gets her to that oh so happy sleepy state, BUT then once that sleepy state hits, the paci slips out and WAAHHHHHHHH. She is not a happy girl. So here come Mommy and Daddy running to pop that bugger back in. The first day we tried her in her crib I counted 35 times that I came in to put the pacifier back in so she would nap. Finally it worked and she slept for a good 2 hours! It is gradually getting better where it doesn't seem to wake her as often, which we are grateful for. She even has gone to sleep 3 times today without fussing at all! What a change from just a week ago.

She also has set herself on a nice little time schedule. She usually is awake for an hour or so at a time during the day, then sleeps for about 1.5-2. Then she is sleeping anywhere from 3-6 hours at a time at night which has been very nice. It's amazing to see how her body is setting it's internal clock for sleep. She is becoming more predictable with when she will nap and when she will wake. At night I can pretty much expect her to wake between 12 and 1 am and then again between 430 and 530am. Not too shabby! Sometimes she will even surprise me and skip one of them, I like those nights :)

The hardest thing that we are dealing with now that she has gotten used to her crib as the place for sleep, we can't get her to fall asleep as easily other places. But, no complaints, we are just happy to see her getting some sleep and finally liking her crib!

I can definitely say I am learning a lot about dependence on the Lord right now. There is nothing more humbling than being a mommy. I love it, it challenges me and stretches me like never before.

Miya is starting to do a lot more smiling and cooing which has been so fun. She makes you work for those smiles though. She also has decided she hates her carseat. Yikes. She really is a WAY different little girl then she was the first 3 weeks. She would pretty much go with the flow and was happy and content all day. Loved the car, loved her carseat, loved just sitting in her little seat (or anywhere we set her down for that matter) but she is a different girl now! When we would take her for car rides this week she screamed so loud and so hard that she actually ended up drenched in sweat. It was so sad because it usually happened when it was just me in the car so there wasn't much I could do to help her. Eventually she cried herself to sleep...but I am hoping to find a solution to the car screaming, maybe she will outgrow it? Fast I hope :)

Unfortunately I didn't take too many pictures this week...but here are a few!

Walks and getting fresh air have been SOOOOO good for us lately. She loves getting outside and usually sleeps great after getting outside. I love this little hat on her

These little smiles make me melt.

snuggles after bathtime. Sorry it looks like I accidently cut daddy out of most of these pictures. Oops!

bathtime makes her sleepy

haha this is one for her wedding slideshow many years from now :)

Her cute "I love my Auntie" jammies from Auntie Cherai

I love you Auntie!

her and hippity.

she's growing :)

The End.

5 weeks...and sleepless nights :)

2009-05-04T10:47:00.010-04:00

Here we are, 5 weeks :) This week has been the most challenging yet. Tuesday I started to come to grips with the fact that I wasn't feeling well...and needed to do something about it. My incision from my c-section had been really sore, swollen and red for days...and though I know what that means, but being the bad patient I am (I think most nurses are the worst patients) I ignored it for several days. By Tuesday there was no ignoring it. I went to my OB who gave me a "tsk, tsk" for ignoring it and to my dismay he had to reopen a portion of my incision to allow it do drain. He also gave me antibiotics and instructed me to clean it and irrigate it 4 times a day to which I responded: "you know I have a newborn right!?" Just brushing my teeth once a day has been a challenge. He reminded me that I can't take care of Miya if I am not healthy, which finally made sense to me. Thankfully the incision is looking better and I am pretty sure the infection is pretty much gone. I will go back this week to follow up.

This week Miya has also entered a very very fussy phase. It started off with a few days where she just wouldn't nap and would want to eat pretty much every hour, which would then follow with hours of crying on and off. She also was waking up every hour or two at night. She had her one month appointment on Wednesday and he thought her reflux might be worsening and because she has gained so much weight the zantac might not be helping. So he increased her dose. I hoped to see immediate results...but didn't. By Saturday the fussiness seemed to be consolidated a little...meaning she would be ok most of the day, but by the evening it was like a timer went off and the screaming began. She started crying around 7 and went until about 11, pretty much non-stop. It was gut wrenching for me. I kept thinking something must be wrong! So both Lew and I would try everything we knew to calm her, all to no avail. Thankfully Sunday she was a happy girl once the morning passed we hoped maybe Saturday night was just a bump in the road and Sunday night we would have our happy-go-lucky baby girl back. But again just like a timer went off she began to cry this time lasting from 9 until 2 am. This time we both realized there was nothing wrong (at least that we could pin point). We tried everything we could and all we could do was cuddle her and love her while she cried. She would stop for a few minutes and fall asleep...only to resume her crying moments later. She woke up this morning as mellow and calm as can be! She is sleeping peacefully right now, which makes me thankful to know she is at least doing ok part of the day. I talked to her pediatrician today who confirmed what we were thinking: colic. Thankfully colic (if that is what it is) is very normal in this age, and will pass in time. The frustrating thing is that there isn't a lot that we can do. We are still trying different things to sooth her and comfort her, but really time is the key. I would love any tips from Moms out there who have dealt with colic. We are going to try giving her baths every night now to give her a little bit of bedtime routine. We also have had to have her sleep in our bed because that is the only place she really will sleep at night. The pediatrician actually recommended us doing that for now just to help comfort her and allow all of us to get a little more sleep. But among all those things nothing has driven me more to my knees. We have found ourselves praying like never before! Crying out for strength to patiently endure the crying and sleeplessness, as well as peace in the midst of her fussing. I am SO thankfully for the peaceful parts of the day when she is happy and content. One thing that has saved us this week is music. Many times I will just put on some music and dance around with her, sometimes that will calm her down for a while. It's also just good for my soul. There is a song by Bethany Dillon called Hallelujah that I find I will play over and over again making it the prayer of my heart...that I would be able to say "hallelujah" even in the midst of a crying baby, infected incision, and sleep deprivation like I have never seen before!

Here are some pictures. I didn't take too many, but tried to capture the "peaceful moments" which means she is sleeping in most of the pictures!

I love how she crosses her little feet

cuddling with daddy

I just love her so much...

So cute, Lew had her propped up like this when I came home from my doctors appointment, it was the cutest thing. She was quite comfy!

As you can see she HAS to keep her pacifier nearby at ALL times. She is pretty much obsessed with it.

Her new favorite sleeping position...we usually put it in the middle of the living room and she likes to nap there :)

Did I mention she is obsessed with her paci?

Squishy lips :)

She's getting big! 8lbs 13 oz. and 20 1/4 inches! She's a good eater :)

Our little ducky after a bath.

Again with the paci :)

Time really is flying. I must say this week felt longer with all the crying...but still I can hardly believe another week has passed. I am aware that I have so much to be thankful for.

4 weeks!

2009-04-26T18:08:00.010-04:00

I know I say this every week...but time is just flying! I can't believe 4 weeks ago today we got to meet our little Miya, and each day has been an adventure since then! This week has been good as we are learning more about our little girl. She has started to be more awake, some days more than others. I love when she is awake and happy, she will just lay on her little play mat and kick her legs, move her arms and coo. It's very sweet :) I will go through the pictures to tell what this week had in store for us.

Napping with Mama... She is such a cuddler! That is a nice way of saying she really wants to be held most of the day...and night :) We are learning to work with it. Some days she will be fine and we can sit her down etc... but recently she will fall asleep in our arms and we will try to lay her down...and what do you know, she is awake, and crying to be held! We're hoping it's a phase, we are trying to put her down to sleep as much as possible, but these days being somewhat sleep deprived ourselves, we are choosing our battles! Plus we love cuddling with her too.

Snuggling... Speaking of sleep, we did hit a big milestone this weekend! Saturday night she was kind of fussy and acting like she was starving! I fed her and fed her pretty much from 7 until 10 then she finally fell asleep....and much to my surprise she slept until 4:30am! Yes, that's right our girl slept through the night for the first time on the eve of her 4 week birthday :) Then after that I thought it couldn't get any better but I laid her back down at 5:15 and she slept until 8:45! I woke up and felt like a new woman...I would love to see the trend repeat itself...but am not getting my hopes up :)

Hanging with Dad

Still working out those little biceps. Her neck has gotten so strong! And her little legs are strong too, I can't believe how she can scoot herself over the pillow using her legs!

Awake!

This is her in her little bathrobe :) She is still quite fond of her bath time, except we did learn a valuable lesson. Don't wake a sleeping baby to give them a bath...it's never worth it! We tried and let's just say we had one VERY unhappy girl on our hands. I think it took her a good few hours to calm down after that!

Little Miya got to meet her Auntie Cherai for the very first time this weekend! She loved getting to meet her and enjoyed her visit very much! We also enjoyed being able to eat dinner in peace while Auntie Cherai held her for us...I have grown accustomed to eating with Miya in my lap, but it was nice to get to eat without worrying about dropping food on her head!

Giving hugs goodbye

"playing" during one of her happy awake times

Big yawn!

no more pictures please!

Giving meema big smiles...I love it :) This past friday she started smiling while awake, it's the best!

Her hair has started to get some wave, she has this one cute little curl in the front that I just had to get a picture of :)

Miya also has another new trick. She will hook her fingers around her pacifier and pull it out of her mouth and keep it in her hand. It cracks us up because she eventually will try to get it back in her mouth and that never goes very well....but it's lots of fun to watch! We don't know what she's thinking but we think she's pretty smart :)

love her little toes!

Not quite sure what she's doing with her little hands here :)

That's it for now! We are so thankful for every day with our little girl. This upcoming week she has her one month appointment with the pediatrician, we are wondering how much she weighs now, she has been eating well, and those cheeks are only getting bigger!

My portion. My cup.

2009-04-23T10:47:00.002-04:00

My Mom reminded me of this encouragement from Elisabeth Elliot's book "Keep a Quiet Heart" (one of my favorites!)

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." (1 Cor 10:13)

Think of that promise and keep a quiet heart! Our enemy delights in disquieting us. Our Savior delights in quieting us. "As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you." is His promise (Is 66:13). The choice is ours. It depends on our willingness to see everything in God, receive all from His hand, accept with gratitude just the portion and the cup He offers. Shall I charge Him with a mistake in His measurements or with misjudging the sphere in which I can best learn to trust Him? Has He misplaced me? Is He ignorant of things or people which, in my view, hinder my doing His will?

God came down and lived in the same world as a man. He showed us how to live in this world, subject to it's vicissitudes and necessities, that we might be changed- not into an angel or a storybook princess, not wafted into another world, but changed into saints in this world. The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.

He whose heart is kind behond all measure
Gives unto each day what He deems best,
Lovingly it's part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling til with peace and rest.
-Lina Sandell

Now just to clarify I don't in any way view Miya as a "trial" she is one of the greatest gifts I have ever received! But the new responsibilities and the dying of my selfishness is the biggest battle, and caring for a newborn has a unique way of bringing out selfish tendencies. Although I must say loving and caring for Miya is surely a delight! I am still a selfish person, and am learning daily to battle it! I have thought things like: "being a Mother will get easier when she is sleeping through the night" or "once she doesn't need to eat as often we will be able to get out a lot more" or "how long until Lew and I can get out together, just the 2 of us?" etc... So often I find myself looking ahead to the promised "comforts" of tomorrow thinking that "then I will find rest". But in looking ahead I am often missing God's provision today, He is providing rest (even in the midst of sleepless nights), rest just comes in different forms right now! Last night it came in the form of a sweet husband and a sleeping baby that allowed a 2 hour nap after dinner. The truth is God is here in the midst of my current circumstances working on my heart and providing rest in the most unexpected ways. My prayer is that I will learn to look for those "rest stops" throughout the day. Which is hard for me because I am very good at relying on my own strength.

Lord thank you that the solution is Christ in me....not me in a different set of circumstances! Help me not to rush past this sweet season you have me in by looking to the next one as "easier" but instead let me see this as "my portion" and my "cup":

The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.
Psalm 16: 5-6

Washing feet...

2009-04-21T10:05:00.002-04:00

I never realized how much motherhood means laying down your life. I mean don't get me wrong I knew it would require sacrifice...but I think until you are in the throw of things you don't really understand how much you will be laying down your life, preferences, and comforts for your child. Not to say it isn't a joy, it absolutely is, but one of the biggest struggles I have had is the loss of sleep which has become a bigger issue these past few nights. Miya has decided she has better things to do than to sleep at night...and on top of that when she does sleep at night she wants to be in our bed next to me...nowhere else. She used to love to sleep in her little comfy seat in our bedroom, but no more. Last night after her waking up about every hour or 2 by 3:30am I woke up to find a crying baby with a diaper that had oh so conveniently leaked all over me, our bed, and poor miya. With tears I looked at Lew and said "I don't think I can do this". In that moment I felt so weak, probably the weakest I have ever felt! My heart was saying "I want to care for my little girl!" but my body was saying "sleep...I so desperately need sleep!" Thankfully we were able to clean up the mess and I was able to feed her and get her back to sleep...but even this morning when she woke me up at 6, I felt that weakness turning into weariness. "How am I going to deal with a new day...and new challenges?"

Well I have found encouragement for my soul from many directions. First my sweet husband who gently and lovingly serves both of us and reminds my heart of truth when I am feeling doubtful. And my Mom who calls regularly to check in with me also called this morning. She reminded me that these are the years of sacrifice, Mothering young children isn't easy, but God gives grace! And my dear friend Renee who just listened to me and reminded me that all these temptations are common! Sometimes it helps just to be reminded that your normal :)

I also found encouragement in a book I have been reading called "The Ministry of Motherhood" by Sally Clarkson. I was reading the chapter called "The Grace of Time Together" and it hit me: right now I am called to care for my daughter and the best gift I can give her is my time. Time to love her, be awake with her, feed her, nurture her, and tend to her needs. And as she grows the time I give her may look different, but none the less the gift of my time will always be a gift of grace to my sweet girl, and Lord willing other children we may have. Now what I have really had to come to grips with is the fact that giving her my time means not giving my time to many other things! A few examples: cleaning (this looks VERY different now!), leisure, cooking, getting out, sleeping, and yes even showering. Some days it's hard to get the basic stuff in... and I am battling to remind myself that I am doing the most important things. If at the end of the day my husband is loved and cared for, and Miya is fed, clean, loved, and happy....then it was a successful day. How different this life looks than it once did. But oh how I want to emulate the sacrifice of our Savior to my daughter.

This particular section in "The Ministry of Motherhood" spoke to me:

I once had great feats I wanted my children to accomplish with their lives. I wanted them to have strong moral character and to be a testimony for Christ. I wanted them to be leaders to their lost and wondering friends. I wanted them to be excellent in their manners and conduct, work habits, and schoolwork and to be gracious and patient to each other I wanted them to take up their cross and follow hard after Christ in whatever they were asked to do.

I still have those dreams, of course. But I've also realized that my dreams are not necessarily what really motivate my children to become the best they can be. What matters to them is my loving presence....If I want them to be open to my messages, I need to be willing to serve them- to voluntarily give up my rights and my time to meet their felt needs-just as Jesus was willing to give for his disciples.

The night before Jesus was to be crucified his heart and mind must have been filled with such weariness and exhaustion at the thought of what he would soon endure. The sins of the whole world-throughout all of history! were about to be placed on his back as he laid down his life to pay the penalty for all of us. He knew he would be rejected by those who loved him, He would be beaten and scourged, spit upon, and wrongly sacrificed in the most demeaning way upon a cross while be handles by rough and sneering Roman soldiers Yet it is at this point we see him making a beautiful gesture of love and service towards his disciples:

"Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him" John 13:1,3-5

Jesus spent his last night on earth with his disciples in service to them. How powerful their memories of that night must have been--The King of the whole universe touching and rubbing their dusty feet and gently drying them with a towel....

Passing on the gift of grace to our children requires commitment and yes, a sacrifice--of time, love, and heart service. The grace we give by serving our children will provide them with a pattern to follow the rest of their lives. When they relate to their own friends, bosses, neighbors, spouses, and children, the example of our lives will steer the decisions they make. The grace they show to others will largely come from parents who learned it first from our own servant King.

Christ truly knew what it meant to feel weary, yet he chose to lay down his own comforts and serve his disciples. I am praying for this heart, the heart of our servant King. I am becoming more and more aware that this is a season of sowing seeds into my daughters heart and life. Even just by meeting her most basic needs in this season, I can exemplify servanthood by putting aside my own preferences and giving her my time and love. It may be a long while before I get to see any fruit, but I am sowing in faith for the future. I am finding there are so many lessons to learn from Motherhood! And it couldn't be any sweeter.

3 weeks!

2009-04-19T21:07:00.007-04:00

Another week has passed, and it's hard to believe. Lew is back to work and this will be Miya's and mine first full week together without Daddy here, we already miss him! This week has been great, and Miya is getting more and more alert. She still gets thrown off and can't quite tell the difference between night and day. We try to wake her up after dinner to give her some "awake" time before bedtime...but no matter what we do she occassionally likes to be awake from 9 until about midnight. She doesn't fuss, she just wants to be held and fed...and fed some more! So we usually compensate for those nights by sleeping in. Thankfully that doesn't happen often, but tonight happens to be one of those nights so as I type I am holding her while she stares at me with wide open eyes. I don't think she has any intention of falling to sleep anytime soon :) On the in between nights she likes to sleep for 3-4 hour chunks, which defintely makes up for the other late nights!

Another new thing this week was we found out Miya has reflux. We had been trying to figure out what was bothering her, she would occassionally spit up, but she also was choking and gagging a lot during feedings which was concerning to both Lew and I. So we took her to the pediatrician who gave her zantac. We tried that for a few days, but she absolutely hated the taste of it! So we tried something called colic calm that a friend of ours recommended, and it seems to be helping, she also loves the taste of it. Thankfully our girl doesn't have colic, but this stuff is all natural and can help with anything from reflux to baby gas and other digestive issues. The only problem is it has vegetable charcoal (so it's black and thick) in it which can be quite messy when we give it to her....but the relief is definitely worth it!

This week she has continued to do her tummy time but it usually follow this sequence:

"so what exactly do you guys want me to do here?"

"I'm supposed to use my arms and do what?"

"how about if I just lay here instead?"

"don't worry I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes..."

Going....
going...
gone!

We actually did get her to push up with her little arms and use her neck muscles...but it only lasted for a moment. But you have to start somewhere!
this is her successfully using her little arms to do a "push up". She made mama so proud ;)

This is her in her cute baby gap dress (thanks Aunt Janet!) She wasn't too happy about being posed for this picture which explains the scrunched up face. This was the best out of 8 pictures if that tells you anything :) That is another thing we have discovered in week 3...Miya has very strong preferences and she isn't afraid to make them known! We are discovering these preferences slowly but surely, but no matter how much we seek to understand her, they change from day to day. The other day for instance we were changing her diaper and she began to cry so hard she turned purple from head to toe! It sure gave mama a scare, so much of a scare that I called her doctor. Her pediatrician patiently confirmed that if Miya calmed down once we finished changing her that this was simply her way of saying "I DON"T LIKE THIS!" with a good healthy cry. Apparently a cry that makes a baby purple just means they are healthy and have a good set of lungs :) Good to know!

These are some more pictures of Miya following tummy time. It's amazing how exhausted she gets after only being awake for an hour!
Resting on Daddy

She's out. I'm pretty sure she stayed like this for a while!

Yesterday we went to our first Church service, which went well. I was hoping she would sleep through the whole service which unfortunately didn't happen. She woke up right as the message started and started squeaking...which almost always leads to a good loud cry so I was thankful for the warning and whisked her out of the sanctuary. We enjoyed the message from a comfy chair in the lobby.

We then spent some time at Meema and Pop Pop's house. Aunt Rachel, Uncle Jeremy and Brendon also stopped by too! It was fun to get out and spend some time with family

Here she is very Uncle Jer

Loving on Pop Pop

If you can believe this...We just discovered we have absolutely NO pictures of the 3 of us! Yup it took us all this time to figure out that we have been so caught up in caring for our new girl that we never had someone take a picture of our new little family! Whoops :) Well no time like the present...
Here we are!
and one more.

And just because she is so cute and Daddy insisted....
I'm sure she will enjoy many a cubs games with Papa when she gets a little older :)

So that's pretty much the update for week 3! Hard to believe our girl is growing so fast. I can tell she is putting on lots of weight...mostly evidenced by her growing cheeks :) We are enjoying every moment with her!

Dear Papa...

2009-04-17T09:46:00.003-04:00

Dear Papa,

I just wanted to thank you for being my Daddy. Thank you for all the snuggles, and kisses and songs that you sing to me. I feel so safe with you especially when I hear your voice, that very same voice that talked, sang, and read to me when I was in Mommy's tummy. I love spending time with you, even though I sleep a lot, I know when you are there, and feel so safe and secure in your arms. I don't know if Mommy knows how blessed she is to have you, but I sure know that I have the best Daddy in the whole world. Thanks for staying up with me late at night sometimes so Mommy can take a nap before she feeds me next. I love reading Morning and Evening with you and singing hymns together, even when it's in the middle of the night.

Thank you for teaching me about Jesus and planting seeds in my heart! I love you so very much, and miss you now that you are back at work. Mommy and I are counting down the hours until you come home to us. We love you more than you could ever imagine. I am glad you are much calmer than Mommy, she tends to worry about a lot of things...but I like it when you remind her that God is in control, and not her. She needs those reminders a lot, and I'm glad she has you there to remind her. What would we do without you Daddy? I can't wait to snuggle with you again.

Love you so much!
Miya

tummy time!

2009-04-15T17:52:00.005-04:00

We tried some tummy time and Miya was cracking me up. She liked it at first but soon got tired of it...literally and fell asleep :) It was cute because at first she was even pumping her little legs to get over the pillow I had under her chest. She doesn't seem to love being on her stomach, she prefers her side, her left side, just like her mommy.

I love that her llittle fat cheeks squish her one eye shut :)

sleepy girl after her tummy time nap

she loves daddy

just because I love her toes...

2 weeks...and Happy Easter!

2009-04-12T19:55:00.012-04:00

I can't believe another week has gone by. It's amazing how much babies change from day to day. I think about this Sunday compared to last Sunday and I feel like we are finally starting to get the hang of things. Miya is doing great with feeding now (praise the Lord!) I have been letting her set her feeding schedule and she has done very well with that. She eats about every 2-3 hours during the day and she goes at least one 4 hour stretch at night. Which is such a blessing. She also has started to have some awake periods during the day which has been oh so fun. I love seeing her eyes open as she looks around in wonder trying to figure out this world she is in. She follows people with her eyes and loves to stare at certain things in the room. It's the sweetest thing to watch because she is perfectly content when she is awake, so we can sit and talk to her or we can lay her under her little play gym and let her play and listen to the music. She also happens to be bit of a night owl and likes to be awake until 1030 or 11. Which is ok with Mommy who happens to be nightowl as well :)
Here are some pictures from this past week...

playing...

she was pretty mesmorized by the colors...

reading spurgeon with Daddy

Her first Easter! We dressed her up in one of her sweet dresses, but ended up not going to church. It's still a little too soon and her schedule is still very unpredictable. Plus I would feel more comfortable giving her one more week since her immune system is immature. But we watched a live Easter service online for Mars Hill Church in Seattle :)

I think she likes being dressed up :)

snuggled in Mommy's robe.

snoozing with daddy

little mohawk

Comfy...even though she looks like she is lying upside down!

talking to daddy.

where did my clothes go?

Daddy's little princess she is indeed :)

first nap in her crib.

She LOVES her lamby!

she looks like an angel when she sleeps.

This video is probably just for the grandparents, everyone else might find it boring ;) but she is so wide awake here and it's very sweet, this was actually the most awake I had seen her. She is just looking all around. She also was kicking the rattles over and over again, I think she liked the noise. She played happily here for a good 20 or so minutes.

She also lost her cord today so we were able to give her a real bath! She loved it, and loved the little bath seat Grandma and Grandad Lewis gave her!

rubba-dubba

Her eyes would get pretty big when we would splash her with the water

drying off...

starting to get sleepy...

So that's the recap for week 2. Tomorrow we have another appointment with the pediatrician. She has to get her 2nd PKU which means getting a heel stick...which breaks Mama's heart. Last Thursday she gained 9 oz in 5 days, and I am wondering how much she will weigh tomorrow. She is surpassing everyones expectations for her wt. gain since she was so tiny at birth. She eats like a champ and my guess is she will be over 7lbs tomorrow. She will be a little chunker in no time :)

People have asked....

2009-04-12T19:52:00.002-04:00

...how to pronounce our girlies name "Miya". Don't worry if you have pronounced it wrong :) It really doesn't bother me. Because we chose to spell her name with a "y" in it many people pronounce it as "mya" but it is actually pronounced "mee-ya" as you would pronounce "mia". It means temple of peace...which so far is very true of our girl! Just wanted to clarify.

Meeting Grandma and Granddad

2009-04-12T18:58:00.004-04:00

This week we got to have Grandma and Granddad Lewis here from Indiana to meet Miya! It was such a joy to see how much they love our little girlie. She was quite smitten with them too :)

Grandma and Granddad Lewis thanks for coming! We know our girl is so blessed to have a Grandma and Grandpop like you two. I'm glad she finally opened her eyes for you too! She has been doing a whole lot more of that lately.

Here are some pictures from their stay:

Miya loves her granddaddy

And Grandma has won Miya's heart as well :)

more strength

2009-04-07T09:36:00.002-04:00

This morning during Miya's 3:30 am feeding I was very aware of weariness. We both had upset stomachs last night which means we both didn't sleep very well and Miya also is having a little growth spurt which means she is waking up more often to eat as well. As I was sitting feeding her I kept thinking "How am I going to make it tomorrow, I haven't gotten enough sleep and we have a busy day tomorrow!" I also tend to think about all the stuff I want to get done the next day and I can be weary thinking I won't have enough energy. Even though I love feeding my girl, and it's such a joy to know she is growing and that is why she is needing eat more often, I can easily fall into weariness when it comes to the middle of the night feedings. Especially when I have gotten used to her sleeping at least 3 hours at a time at night. But as I was feeding her I read this devotional from "Joy & Strength" that I get in my email each day:

All At Once

When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then Thou knewest my path.

PSALMS 142:3

THE work which we count so hard to do,
He makes it easy, for He works too;
The days that are long to live are His,--
A bit of His bright eternities;
And close to our need His helping is.

SUSAN COOLIDGE

DO not yield to the temptation of looking at everything at once, as if everything would happen at once, and all the events of the day be crowded into an hour. Do not thus forecast, but take each thing as it comes to you, and look upon it as the present expression of the will of God concerning you; then regard the next in the same way, and thus receive your day piece by piece from Him who will remember always when He gives you work to do, that you need strength to do it.

Often, when you have almost fainted in spirit, the thought comes, "If thou hast run with the footmen, and they have wearied thee, what shalt thou do with the horsemen?" Put it from you, it is a faithless thought; if you need more strength, you will have it, be sure of that; or the call to greater exertion may never come to you. Your business is with the present; leave the future in His hands who will be sure to do the best, the very best for you.
PRISCILLA MAURICE

How sweet and comforting to know that I am guarenteed the strength for the next thing! I don't even need to give it a second thought, it's a promise. I just need to rest in that promise, and I am so thankful. I have to remind myself...one moment at a time.

sneak peak...

2009-04-07T08:06:00.001-04:00

My friend Megan kindly did some newborn pictures of our sweet girl. You can check them out on her BLOG.

Thank you so much Megan! We love them :)

1 week

2009-04-05T09:35:00.005-04:00

I can't believe it's been a week. I don't even know how to sum up this past week. It has been so full and there have been so many new experiences I just can't believe how much has changed in such a short period of time! We brought Miya home on Wednesday and it has definitely been an adventure. I feel like there is something new everyday and it definitely keeps me on my toes! Learning to feed her and care for all of her most basic needs is very humbling and at times can feel so overwhelming! But it is a joy, I keep telling Lew "Can you believe we have a child, and she is totally dependent on us!?"

So what has this week looked like with our Miya Noelle?

-She is such a calm baby. I can't believe it. I thought all newborns were like this, but my pediatrician assured me that this is not so. It doesn't take much for her to be happy, just a full belly, snuggles, and warmth. And really pretty much if she's fed she's happy!

-She is still trying to get the hang of feeding. Or should I say we are trying to get the hang of it. It's definitely a team effort. There have moments where I thought "I don't know if I can do this." We have also had many crying sessions where we both are in tears...But there has been so much grace to persevere through the learning process and stick with it. It is definitely one of those things that for being so "natural" it definitely doesn't come naturally!

-She doesn't like to be swaddled too much, I mean she doesn't mind it, but she prefers to have her hands free so she can keep them close to her face and mouth.

-She had her first bath at home and lets just say....she pretty much hated it! It was so funny my Mom, Dad, Lew, and I were all crammed into the bathroom giving her a bath...she was just not thrilled about the whole thing. Lew even videotaped parts of it, but there is lots of crying in this video so it's not for the faint of heart (I'm speaking to myself really, I can't stand to see her cry!) It's cute because at one point she looked like she was enjoying me washing her hair....until I had to rinse it...then it was back to tears!

happy and awake after her bath

Thank for the help meema and pop pop!

And she's out :) I think we wore her out

-She got to meet her great grandma Kouneski for the first time!

-Miya had her first doctors appointment and we were so happy to hear she had gained 5 ounces in just 2 days! She is only 3 away from her birthweight which is good news. We just have to keep getting her to eat and eat since she is so tiny.

-She had her first photoshoot with my friend Megan! We will post those once we have them

-She has really enjoyed sleep... lots and lots of sleep. I can't believe how much she loves it. She has been sleeping on my chest for the past 2 hours while I write these lengthy posts and I know that in about 5 minutes I will have to wake her and get her to eat! Which is not easy...she would prefer sleep over food sometimes! She is sleeping about 3 hours at a time at night and sometimes she will wake herself up to eat, but usually I end up having to wake her up and get her completely undressed in order to get her to eat. But thankfully I have been getting about 5-7 hours of sleep at night in about 2-3 hour increments, which hasn't been too bad. And feeding has only taken about 30-40 minutes at night on average which I am thankful for.

There is so much more but one thing that has really been eye opening this week has been how much I need God's help right now. Being a Mom is wonderful and truly the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced....but it's also hard at times, and requires complete sacrifice. Now let me just say I have never enjoyed sacrificing for another person more than I do for Miya...but still this life that I have now looks very very different from the one before. At times nothing looks familiar and that can seem so scary. My body is weak and recovering while I try to tend to this little baby, my mind sometimes races at all that I think I "need" to get done, and sometimes I feel lost in this new world wondering when things will look more like the old life. But I have been more thankful for grace then ever before. I know I need help and probably have never prayed more than I have this past week. What grace that God would use this to draw me nearer to him. I have never felt so humbled as I do as a new Mom. I was reading a friends blog from when she was a new Mom and she posted an article called "40 days with Natalie" that spoke to my heart so much! The article talks about how things will not look as they once did...this is a "new normal". I need to embrace this new normal and not try to fight to fit Miya into what once was normal in our life. The article can be found here. I would recommend it for any Mom or soon to be Mom. It has been such a joy as I have sought to not look back at what the "old life" looked like, but rather to just take one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. Our lives have been changed forever in such a dramatic way. I want to enjoy every moment I have in this new season. I know she will grow up so fast and I don't want to live looking ahead to the next thing and missing out on where I am right now.

Happy 1 week Miya! We love you so so so so much. You bring your mommy and papa so much joy, and we can't thank God enough for you!

How do you start...

2009-04-05T09:05:00.003-04:00

...a blog post to sum up the most life changing week of your life? That is what has been on my mind today as I thought "I should blog about this past week". Either way I can start by saying our little Miya Noelle made her debut Sunday March 29th at 833 am weighing 6lbs 8oz and 18 1/2 inches long.

No doubt this past week has provided many opportunities to trust in God, rejoice, and receive God's will as "good" even when it includes things not in my plan. I have probably learned more this week than I have in many many years. This will probably be a long post, but did you expect any different? :)

The Labor Story (for those who haven't heard it yet)
So it all started this past Friday morning. Lew and I had a very rough night Thursday night because I had been really sick with an upper respiratory infection that caused a lot of wheezing and difficulty breathing especially at night. In fact I was awake from 1-6 am simply because the wheezing and coughing had gotten so bad and my inhaler wasn't working. So, early Friday morning Lew decided he would work from home and we would call my doctor and find out what we should do about the infection. I had already been on antibiotics for a few days and they just didn't seem to be cutting it. I honestly thought we would end up at the hospital on Friday...little did I know that I was right, just not for the reason I originally thought. So, after finally getting a little more sleep I woke up to discover my water was leaking, it totally caught me off guard. I called my OB and he told me to come in immediately. When we got there they checked the baby and did an ultrasound confirming that I was losing fluid, but my levels still looked good so I didn't need to go to the hospital yet. I had started to have contractions so my doctor told me to go home and basically walk, walk, and walk to get things moving. We did just that, in fact I really think we walked more than 5 miles total just trying to get things started. By 5pm I talked to my OB and my contractions were getting closer, so he encouraged us to go the hospital by 9pm to be admitted. Unfortunately, my OB was going out of town so I wouldn't get to have him there, this was the first challenge for me. He has followed the whole pregnancy so it was hard to think about him not being there. But he assured me I would be in good hands with the doctor on call.

Last picture before we left for the hospital on Friday

Me looking really enthusiastic as we take one last picture in L&D

Off we go to Shady Grove at around 8 Friday night. Both incredibly giddy about the fact that we would most likely meet our baby in the next day (or so we thought!). We were admitted and put in a room and monitored. My first check I was very surprised to find out I hadn't made any progress. I was still 1-2 cm dilated and completely effaced, but no new progress. I couldn't have been more surprised. I was having contractions almost 2-3minutes apart and had been for hours, yet no change. So we walked, and walked, and walked. I can't tell you how many hours we spent wondering the short hallway in labor and delivery. My Mom met us there and I was so glad to have her there. Once we hit about 3 or 4 am we noticed something interesting, my contractions were really close together when I walked but as soon as we started to rest they would slow down if not stop. This went on for hours and we were getting so tired from walking I didn't know how I was going to be able to deliver Miya if we kept that up! So, by Saturday morning at 7 we talked to our doctor and decided to start pitocin by noon if things didn't pick up. Sure enough by noon things were going nowhere fast, so up went the pitocin. The contractions started to pick up as they upped the dose but we discovered another interesting trend. The contractions would pick up and start to come close together and stronger and then all the sudden they would space out again. It was almost like clockwork, and everyone was pretty much shocked. They just kept upping my dose over and over again and things would pick up and then totally space out and die down. We went on like this until about midnight when something concerning happened. My contractions started coming one right after the other with no breaks and Miya's heartrate started to drop. Each time the nurse would rush in turn me on my left side and put oxygen on me. I remember each time my heart would just sink, I was so worried about how all this was affecting miya. Thankfully after a break from the pitocin along with the other measures she would always recover and within an hour or so the pitocin would be back on. But this kept happening over and over again. Finally the doctor came in to check my progress at about 2 am and we were all totally floored to find out I had made absolutely no progress. It was shocking and discouraging. My Mom, Lew, and I were all going on pretty much no sleep and we all realized we were getting close to me having been in labor for 48 hours. I was terribly discouraged, but thankfully my Mom and Lew were able to encourage me and we just kept waiting and praying. Unfortunately about every hour we hit the same bump and miya was just not tolerating labor anymore. I started to panic at this point. I looked at my birth plan and cried. We had planned and prepared for this beautiful natural birth...and look what was happening. I couldn't imagine a c-section and though the word hadn't been mentioned yet, it was hanging over my head like a heavy heavy weight. I remember how much fear I started to feel at this moment, and then my Mom leaned over me and began to recite Psalm 121, I knew she was reading my thoughts, and knew the fear I was experiencing. Psalm 121 reads:

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;
he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil;
he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep
your going out and your coming in
from this time forth and forevermore.

This is a very special verse between my Mom and I. She recited it to me many a times when I was in the hospital and struggling with fear among other things. As soon as she started to recite it I just started to cry. It was such a sweet reminder that my help comes from the Lord. I knew I was in good hands. So by 7am my doctor came in to check me one more time, I could tell by the look on his face that we were going nowhere, and my heart was at peace. He encouraged me that we had been patient and literally tried everything we could to do this naturally, but at this point we needed to consider Miya's safety. So, we decided a c-section was the best option. Every moment after this seems so surreal. But I still had peace (praise the Lord). My doctor said alright lets get ready we're going to start in 3o minutes. I just couldn't believe it, this was it, we were gonna meet our little girl in the next hour! I just couldn't believe it. So I got prepped, got my spinal and there I was strapped down on a gurney being cut open while awake (ok I still can't get over how weird this was....seriously I can't even tell you!) and I was reminded of still how funny it was that none of our plans for the birth had been successful...but none of that mattered because we were going to meet our daughter any minute. And then we heard the most beautiful thing I have every heard in my life, her sweet cries. Lew just glanced over the divider and then looked at me and said "Oh my goodness, she is precious" And I my heart just overflowed. Lew was soon able to join her and hold her for the first time. When he brought her over and I got to see her for the first time I immediately thought, I would do this ten times over for her. It all seemed so worth it. While they were stitching me up I just longed to hold her. That was the hardest part, but there was such a sweetness in watching her and how much she already loved her Daddy. I remember I looked at Lew and said "how do you feel" and he just said "so proud"....it was so precious. Once everything was done they put Miya on my stretcher and wheeled us out to recovery. Soon after Lew and Miya went to the nursery for her to be bathed etc... The 2 hours we were apart seemed like an eternity, but thankfully my Mom and Dad were there to keep me company. Once she came back with her daddy I just couldn't get enough of her! I just kept looking at her and thinking: "we made that, she's ours!?" It all just seemed so hard to believe.

This is us immediately after the C-section being wheeled to the PACU. Do you see my little babushka at the bottom?

My first time holding her in the PACU. I didn't want to let her go....ever! It was hard to let them take her to the nursery.

All I remember at this point was I was so tired....and so high on adrenaline at the same time. It had been a loooong 2 days.

The hospital stay was slightly unnerving at times. Since we had been there for 2 nights already while in labor, having to stay 3 additional nights seemed like forever! Plus let me just say the hospital is not a place to get rest. I had people coming in and out of my room all day and night! The night nurses especially tended to come in and out the most, turning on the bright lights and asking me lots of question while I'm groggy like how many poops and pees Miya has had etc... But we made it and were so thrilled to get home.

Proud papa meeting his daughter
Poor Miya, not to thrilled about being naked and wondering what is going on!

She still likes to have her hands up by her face like this :) If I swaddle her she finds a way to get her hands out

Sweet girl with lots of hair

So peaceful...

Miya is doing great, and we are so thankful to have her as an addition to our family! Although there have been difficult moments being a new Mom, I still can't get over what a beautiful and rewarding experience it is! Our little girl has been so mellow and calm I actually almost called her pediatrician to make sure this was ok. When we saw the pediatrician on Friday she just couldn't tell me enough how fortunate we are to have such a calm peaceful baby! I mean the girl can sleep and sleep and sleep and I usually have to strip her down to get her to eat. So far she loves any and all music and if we sing to her while changing her diaper and clothes that will keep her from crying. I have to say our prayers were answered when we asked God for a sweet calm baby like Lew :) And she has definitely been true to the meaning of her name which is: "temple of peace". We just feel so blessed! I will post more on Miya soon. Hard to believe it's been a week and she is already changing and growing so much!

38 weeks, ready or not!

2009-03-25T11:38:00.002-04:00

So I wanted to give a quick update, but first let me say I just can't believe how close we are! I look at the days passing by and think oh my gosh it really will be any day now! And yes, we are so very excited.

This past week I actually got sick again. I know, in the words of my OB "wow this pregnancy has really knocked your immune system out." Yup, he's right. I have pretty much been sick every 2 weeks, but ya know I will probably never appreciate my immune system more than I will after Miya is born. Whatever I have now has been the worst so far, and my doctor believes that it is basically the same infection that never really goes away and just keeps coming back stronger than before. So this time we are trying a stronger antibiotic with a super powered cough syrup with codeine in it. He is really hoping that at least this cough medicine will help me to sleep so I can be well rested for labor...I happen to like the thought of that. We would love your prayers that my body would respond well to these antibiotics and that this will be the end of this sickness for good!

So, in bigger news, baby Miya is really ready to go! I am 2cm dilated and my cervix is pretty much completely thinned out and ready to go. My Dr. just kept saying "oh this is so great, her head is so low and in the most perfect position and your body is just as ready as it can be!" That was music to my ears as I have been having lots of contractions. He said I am very "favorable" for labor and he really thinks she is going to come soon, he feels even stronger about his prediction that I will not make it to my 40 week due date. Sounds wonderful.

So we will keep you posted. Could be any day now, how crazy is that :) Any suggestions of last minute things I should get in before she comes?

Maybe...maybe not :)

2009-03-23T08:42:00.002-04:00

Yes, we've entered the "is this it" of pregnancy. It's actually been quite humorous. I have been having semi-strong painful contractions since Thursday, but obviously Miya is not here yet. So there have been many moments of timing them, rushing to pack the bag, and asking each other "could this be it?" I won't complain though, this seems to have been the case for my sister (who had contractions weeks before hand and had short labors both times) sounds great to me. Although the thought of being like this for 2 more weeks does seem a little tough to stomach. I have already started to pray: "Lord I know your timing is perfect...but (gotta love those "buts" in prayers) if it's your will can she come soon?" We are also praying she will come early/on time so Lew's parents can enjoy their first grandchild when they visit the week of our due date. So please pray with us!

The funniest part has been the lack of sleep that has come with this waiting game, especially for my sweet husband. Saturday night I woke him up after having contractions 5 minutes apart that were painful enough I couldn't sleep through them. I jumped out of bed exclaiming "we need to pack the bag!" Needless to say neither of us got good sleep that night and the contractions eventually tapered off. Another funny thing that cracks me up is I tend to want to "check on Lew" throughout the night. I don't know why I do this, but it has only happened since I have been pregnant, and it is definitely worse now as we near the end. Basically, I wake up and get this impulse to "check on him" which looks like a poke, or a tap, or just saying his name. In response poor Lew (who probably thinks I'm waking him because I'm in labor) jumps out of his sleep and replies "are you ok" or "what's wrong?" to which I reply "oh nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were ok". And being the sweet husband he is, he just says ok and rolls over and goes back to sleep. My sister-in-law Rachel reminded me of the Dad from Father of the Bride 2 (which happens to be one of my all time favorite movies) who eventually resorted to sleeping pills because of the many nights of interrupted sleep and false labor. The sleeping pills totally knocked him out and go figure, finally, real labor starts for both his wife and daughter and he is totally incapacitated from the sleeping pills. Resulting in a very funny scenario for everyone. Hopefully it won't get that far for us, but I watched the clip below from the movie and laughed so hard at the thought of it! I included the clip for your viewing pleasure :)

So the waiting game continues. I will find out if there has been any progress on Wednesday. Until them I am walking as much as possible (drs. orders!) and nesting like crazy to keep myself busy. Also an update on my blood pressure: I have been checking it at home and it has been low every time! Yay! Thanks for your prayers. We shall see what happens!

37 weeks and growing....

2009-03-19T08:20:00.002-04:00

So, we've reached the "full term" mark which has been oh so fun. I find that every morning I wake up wondering "will it be today?" I know most women (especially first time moms) tend to be overdue...but I still have this feeling that it won't be me. I'm sure some of you mommies out there are laughing at my wishful thinking. Either way it's more fun to wake up every day wondering if today will be the day...Which reminds me I need to pack my bag, I still haven't gotten that far :)

The update:

I saw my OB yesterday and everything looks great, I made a little bit of progress this week which is good, he still holds to his prediction that Miya will come right around her due date maybe a little early. We'll see! My group B strep culture came back negative (which is always good news I suppose) and the only thing that alarmed him a little was my blood pressure was up. However, being the skeptical nurse that I am, I think my BP was up because the nurse took me right back as soon as I walked in the door, had me jump on the scale, go the bathroom and go to the exam room all in one swoop then sat me right down to check my blood pressure. I mean a pregnant woman (37 weeks pregnant at that!) needs a chance to sit and catch her breath! So anyways then once he told me it was high he wanted to check it again, and of course it was still high, but not quite as high as it had been. I told him: "Now that you told me it's high I'm going to be anxious about it and that will probably make it high again!" He decided to be cautious and has instructed me to cut salt (which I hardly eat much salt), drink more water (I don't think this is humanly possible, unless I live in the bathroom) and sit with me feet up most of the day (I'm happy to oblige on this one). I am still slightly skeptical. I think it was a fluke, but what do I know. I haven't had any swelling, which is great, so I am not worried. But if you think of it pray that it will be down for my next visit, so poor Dr. Z can stop worrying about it, and so we can continue to wait for Miya to come on her own.

That's it for now! We'll keep you posted if anything eventful happens :)

A Recap.

2009-03-12T07:30:00.004-04:00

Another component of hormones, and lots of time of your hands, is lot's and lots of reflection! I feel like I will spend an hour or so just sitting and "remembering"where Lew and I were a year ago today, or 6 months ago etc... Also as this pregnancy has drawn close to the end I have thought even more about the last 9 months and there is so much I don't want to forget about this journey. Lot's of of the memories are just funny random things, but none the less, I'm sure down the road they will be a fun memory. So, in essence, this is my way of recapping the last 9 months :)
(I'll try to recap in order starting close to the beginning)

-This pregnancy wasn't planned. Our plan was to wait until the fall or winter, which was only a few months away. But now looking back I can see how God's timing was oh so perfect (isn't it always?)

-I had a "gut" feeling I was pregnant at least a week before I took a test to confirm. This was funny because we were in the beginning of the process to buy a home and I had this raging feeling that we should put it on hold, but it was hard to explain to my sweet hubby why. I'll never forget the night we sat with our small group talking through our thoughts on buying now having kids later, or having kids now and buying later...My gut was "kid's now, buy later" and Lew was still trying to sort through what God's will for us was....Just a week later I'll never forget the laughter that erupted when I shared with the dear ladies in our small group that God has made His will "VERY" clear, without a shadow of a doubt :) It was a sweet memory and taught Lew and I a lot about trusting God's timing, rather than our own.

-Lew was the one to tell me I was pregnant. It was a very early morning (probably just slightly before 5) I was getting ready for work and I had taken a pregnancy test but forgot about it (imagine that!) and Lew went to the bathroom and came out with a confused smile and just said "your pregnant!?" It was a funny moment. I wasn't surprised....but I'm pretty sure he was! That was one of the hardest days at work (this is when I was at the PICU) because I was very distracted by the news.

-Our first ultrasound showed that our pregnancy started out as a twin pregnancy, which apparently is very common. I remember the 2 weeks we had to wait in between ultrasounds to confirm if there was 1 or 2...it was a funny time. Though we would receive 2 children as a great gift...we were still overwhelmed by the thought of 1!

-For the first few weeks I took a pregnancy test about every morning just to "be sure" it was real. Thank goodness for dollar tree brand pregnancy tests!

-Morning sickness kicked in at about 7 weeks and progressed until about 14 weeks. Thankfully, I rarely had to throw up during that time frame, but sometimes I almost wished I would. Zofran helped but I was a little leery of taking it too regularly so I just spent a lot of time resting (sleep did wonders on the nausea) and munching on crackers.

-For the first month of my pregnancy I cried every day when I was getting ready to go to work. It was just the thought of working a 12 hour shift and leaving before 6 only to get home after 8 that made me weary. I learned a lot about dependence on the Lord during this weary phase, and boy was it a joy when Lew and I prayerfully decided that transitioning to something part time and a little less demanding was the right decision.

-A few of my cravings in the first trimester: Cereal, most types, but in particular peanut butter captain crunch, life, cracklin oat bran, and peanut butter puffins. I craved fruit like crazy mostly: watermelon, oranges, grapes, and apples. I also liked any fruit juice, for some reason it was hard to just get down water so I really drank a lot of what Lew called my "cocktail" which was either seltzer water mixed with juice, or ginerale mixed with juice (usually cranberry juice). Oh and it had to have lots and lots of ice, crushed was best, especially the crushed ice my hubby made with a plastic bag and our meat mallot :) I also cannot forget my saving grace which was slurpees. I LOVED the coke flavor mixed with a little bit of pina colada. Even as I type this now my mouth is watering. Those things got me through many a hard days. I also loved watermelon italian ice. Another staple was potatoes, I especially loved mashed potatoes from a box! Foods I LOATHED in the first trimester: ANYTHING that had to do with meat....the thought made me gag. Especially ground beef. I remember one night I really wanted to serve Lew and make him a yummy dinner. I think I was going to make tacos, I had everything ready but as soon as I started cooking the ground beef I felt the sickest I think I have ever felt. That meal prep was cut short by a very unfortunate trip to the bathroom....and to be honest it wasn't until recently that cooking ground beef seemed manageable again. I also hated vegetables, garlic or anything that smelled like it. Funny enough I hated most foods that had an odor, so that eliminated most cooked food. So, basically I drank most of my nutrition during the first trimester!

The only cravings I can think of that have carried all the way through to this point: still the fruit juice thing with ice, oranges and most fruit, scrambled eggs, and potatoes. We pretty much eat scrambled eggs once a day :) I also crave potbelly's a lot. Once I got over the "no meat" phase all I wanted was the italian sub from there with everything on it including lots and lots of hot peppers.

-I felt her first movement around 16 weeks. I don't remember what I was doing but all I remember was feeling what felt like bubbles, or popcorn. The feelings got stronger and stronger and by 18 weeks I was feeling definite movement.

-When it came time to find out the gender almost everybody was certain it was a boy, (shout out to Sam, Priscila, Mama Lewis, and Kelly who guessed girl :)) In fact still to this day I have random strangers come up to be and try to convince me that I am carrying a boy. I kid you not. If I had a penny for every stranger that comes up to me and says "oh it's a boy!" I would be a wealthy woman. I had one funny encounter with a woman at my work who said "oh you are definitely having a boy!" I assured her "nope ultrasound says it's a girl" and she replied with "Oh he's hiding it well, huh?!" I almost burst into tears... In fact it made me very alarmed that maybe the ultrasound tech had seen things wrong on the 20 week ultrasound. Thankfully I was able to breath a sigh of relief at the 36 week ultrasound when she assured me "it's still a girl!"

-This pregnancy is the first one (since my sister Hannah had Isaiah, the first grandbaby) where I am pregnant alone. Usually pregnancies come by twos in our family. But now I can't help but wonder, whose next? :) I have my guesses.

-This makes grandchild number 6 for my parents. That is 6 little ones under the age of 3!! It's hard to believe how close in age they are because they are all in such different stages right now. But I hope they will all be close when they are older. And I hope Brendon and Isaiah will protect all the girls :)

-We called Miya "poppy" up until we found out she was a girl and named her. It's hard to believe that she started out as a poppy seed and now is a watermelon!

-We were pretty certain about our chosen names by about 10 or 12 weeks. The boy name was a lot harder than the girls name, but we didn't fight at all over names. I think we kid around a lot, Lew had some very interesting choices picked out, but thankfully we were able to peacefully come up with names we both really liked.

-Lew has been unashamedly talking/singing/reading to my belly since about 10 weeks. Before she could hear of course, but I love his tender heart for this child growing in my belly :) Since about 25 weeks she loves to hear his voice. When he starts talking she just starts to move like crazy. She is gonna love her daddy, and I can't wait to see it.

-I loved the 2nd trimester. In fact I think the 2nd trimester is real gift from God, and probably the reason most women make it through the pregnancy sanely. I had bursts of energy during those 14 weeks that I don't know if I'll ever see again! I would tend to forget I was pregnant too, if it weren't for that growing bump.

-These past few weeks I entered this phase where I feel safest at home, or close to home. Isn't that funny? I have tried to explain it to Lew, it's this feeling of "she is coming any minute and I need to be close to home". Now granted I am just 36 weeks, so more than likely I have a few weeks to go, but I still feel this "safety" at home. I thought it was just be until I read about it in "What to Expect When you are Expecting." Apparently it's an instinct like the nesting instinct.

-I couldn't stand the sight or smell of coffee for the whole first trimester, but by the middle of the second trimester I would have some occasionally. Then when the 3rd trimester fatigue hit I wanted it more often. Lew and I made this "agreement" that if I was going to get coffee every day he would make the coffee and I would either get regular coffee, decaf, or half reg/decaf. The point has been to keep me from knowing what I am getting so I don't get hooked on the caffeine. It kind of makes me laugh though because I am usually pretty certain what I am getting, because by about 9 I can tell that I am running out of steam :) But it has worked pretty well so far.

I think that is it for now. Haha I wonder if anyone actually read this far! I think I did it more for the memory, so I guess it was a very selfish blog post!

Here is the most recent belly shot. We took it during 35 weeks. You can see how high she is, but she has since dropped some (Praise the LORD!) so I can breath slightly better and keep down more than a tablespoon of food at a time :)

Getting close

2009-03-11T12:56:00.002-04:00

I still can't get over how close we are. But I have a feeling these next few weeks will begin to drag on. Especially with more sunlight...the days are longer, which normally I enjoy, and trust me I am trying to enjoy them! But I must say I have turned the corner and am getting close to the "pretty please let labor come soon" phase.

Today I had my 36 week checkup and it was so surreal. We got to see our little girlie one last time before we see her for real and it was so sweet to see her. She is still looking nice and healthy. And we were happy to find out "she" is still a "she". Yes I was slightly fearful that maybe just maybe the 20 week ultra sound was wrong, but the tech happily confirmed, she is all girl. She is measuring somewhere around 5lbs 12 oz. (give or take 1/2 a pound or so). Dr. Z is predicting she will be somewhere between the high end of 6 or low 7 lbs at birth, which is fine by me. I also found out that her head is a wonderful size, whatever that means :) I figure Dr.Z knows enough about this stuff and if he says it's good it must be good. Basically he was trying to explain how it's not too big and not too small. Apparently if it's too small it won't apply even pressure to the cervix during labor...so yippee for a good a good size head. Lew was able to come to this appointment and it was fun having him there. In fact he was so excited to be there he almost fainted during the ultrasound! When we wrapped things up I looked over to see my pale husband bracing for the wall and saying "I don't feel so well". Poor guy. The ultrasound tech just laughed and said "this happens to dads all the time! They get so excited and nervous when it comes close to the baby coming and sometimes they get faint." After getting something to drink he recovered ..and to his credit it was warm in the ultrasound room :)

I was hoping my contractions these last few weeks were actually causing some action, but I found out I am only at 1cm right now, which is pretty typical. She has dropped some which has provided some much needed comfort and allowed for slightly better digestion (and breathing!)

So now we wait. I asked my Dr if he thought she would be late or on time and he said he has a really good feeling that she will be very close to her due date, if not early. I know he's only guessing, but still! A girl has to hold on to some hope!

I took a belly shot the other day but still need to upload it. That is the update for now. I would love prayers for labor to start some time in the next 2 weeks :)

Just a glimpse...

2009-03-07T11:17:00.002-05:00

...into this hormonal girl right now.

Lew and I were in the car last night eating some Rita's and the song "It won't be like this for long" by Darius Rucker came on...and I burst into tears. I mean it wasn't just a tear here or there, it was like full on tears. Yeah I'm not a big crier, but I think I have a cried at least once a day for the past week. Sometimes it just catches me by surprise. Thankfully usually the tears are followed by bursts of laughter. That seems to be the way these hormones work. Tears than unstoppable laughter. It's actually rather enjoyable. At least it gives Lew a good laugh.

Anyways here are the lyrics to the song. I mean seriously can you blame me for crying? :) (I also added the song to my playlist)

He didnt have to wake up
He'd been up all nite
Lay'n there in bed listen'n
To his new born baby cry
He makes a pot of coffee
He splashes water on his face
His wife gives him a kiss and says
It gonna be ok
It wont be like this for long

One day soon we'll look back laugh'n
At the week we brought her home
This phase is gonna fly by
So baby just hold on
It wont be like this for long

Four years later bout four thirty
She's crawling in there bed
And when he drops her off at preschool
She's clinging to his leg
The teacher peels her off of him
He says what can i do
She says now dont you worry
This will only last a week or two

It wont be like this for long
One day soon we'll drop her off
And she wont even know your gone
This phase is gonna fly by
If you can just hold on
It wont be like this for long

One day soon she'll be a teenager
And at times you'll think she hates him
Then he'll walk her down the isle
And he'll raise her vale
But right now she up and cry'n
And the truth is that he dont mind
As he kisses her good night
And she says her prayers
He lays down there beside her
Till her eyes are finally closed
And just watch'n her it breaks his heart
Cause he already knows
It wont be like this for long
One day soon that little girl is gonna be
All grown up and gone
Yeah this phase is gonna fly by
He's try'n to hold on
It wont be like this for long
It wont be like this for long

And just because I can't help myself here is the music video which, yes, made me cry as well. (You will have to pause the music at the bottom for the video). If things keep going at this rate we are in for a really fun few weeks :)

Darius Rucker More CMT Music More CMT Music Videos

primal instincts

2009-03-02T07:40:00.004-05:00

Yes folks the oh so "natural" urge to nest has kicked into high gear. All I can say is poor Lew is getting dragged along for the ride, but unfortunately he doesn't get the adrenaline rush that I get with nesting.

It all started Saturday morning. We had planned to go to Ikea to get a few things we still needed for the nursery. It seemed like everything we needed was there and we headed back home. In Lew's mind we were done for the day and would enjoy a nice relaxing day at home. In fact I think he even mentioned something about a tea party and reading together (yes my sweet love enjoys tea parties with his wife, and I'm sure his daughter will enjoy this about him when she is old enough to partake). Anyways, this pregnant woman had a very different idea. I got home and began opening and assembling everything we got at warped speed. I almost felt compelled to get everything done. So here I am assembling, hanging, and sorting poor Lew is just sitting puzzled...what happened to a nice relaxing tea party? There was no stopping me at this point. Until we found out we bought the wrong size curtain rod. Instead of just waiting to go back to ikea another time and return the wrong one for the correct size we ended up going back out to target to get the proper size rod (I wonder whose idea that was). Then we got home and the madness didn't stop there. I insisted that we could hang the curtain rod without a drill. Neither of us had done it before and I was sure we could do it. Of course I was wrong and it took about 4 holes in the wall and no progress to figure that out.

Around 4 (our day of nesting started at 8am mind you) Lew finally got his break. While I still tried to sort through clothes, books, baby stuff etc... Once Lew woke up from his nap we decided to borrow a drill from a friend (thanks Remy's!) and give the curtain rod another try. So we got the drill but still couldn't get the holes to go in as far as the screw needed to go in, it was like we were hitting metal at a certain point. We tried different spots thinking maybe it was just these certain areas of the wall...but still no success. Finally after a long time of trying and poor Lew standing on top of 2 phone books on a chair (see what he'll do to make his pregnant wife happy!) we finally had a successful hole on the right side. We were sure we figured out the perfect spot and went to finish up on the left side, except we still couldn't get the hole to work on the left side. We both sat down exhausted and did what any smart person would do...turned to our friend google. I don't remember what google told Lew to do but finally after one last attempt he got it! And there was lots of rejoicing in Miya's room! We hung the curtains and then looked up and laughed at the 6 or 7 "practice" holes that we made in our several attempts. We will no doubt never forget this day of nesting :) Then after we got the curtains hung I sat in the rocking chair and just looked around for a long while. I couldn't believe how much we got done in one day! We are pretty much done. Now we just wait for our sweet girl to make her arrival. The next project is to organize her closet. But I promised Lew we would take a few weeks for that...poor guy needs a break. I just never could have believed just how primal this nesting instinct is! It was as if in my mind there was no stopping these things just "had" to get done...even though there are 5 weeks left....it just doesn't seem very long, and what if she comes early (wishful thinking on my part?) We finally were done by 9 and I laid in bed awake for many hours thinking about things we still may need to get done before Miya comes. Then when I finally dozed off I dreamt about anchor screws and draperies. It seems my mind couldn't stop even though my body had finally slowed down.

Well without further ado, if any of you are still reading after the "book" I wrote above here are a few pictures of the progress we made. It's finally coming together. I just can't believe how fast time is going! Do you see those numbers on the side...34 more days. Yikes :)

The curtains finally hung :)

It's hard to see in this picture but the little birdie mobile was one of my favorite purchase from etsy! It was a surprise from Lew. You can get a better look at it here.

I was so thankful for this find at ikea. Originally we were trying to find a small table for next to the rocker. We wanted a place to sit a small lamp as well as a place to store nursing stuff and other stuff I might need easy access to. Well we couldn't find one that would fit the space well so instead we found these little cloth compartments that you can hang on the wall! It's supposed to be for magazines but works perfect for baby stuff and is reachable from the rocker and the changing table. Then we found a little lamp we could mount on the wall. Now we don't have to worry about another piece of furniture crowding the room.

Well that's it. For now. I still can't believe how fast time is going. I just can't wait to meet this sweet little girl. I will probably post a real pregnancy update later on today.

Taking advantage of the warm weather...

2009-02-05T07:20:00.002-05:00

Since we had weather almost into the 60's on Sunday (!!) we were able to do some maternity pictures with our very talented friend Megan Russell. She did an amazing job and we had so much fun.

Check out the sneak peak HERE.

One More..

2009-01-29T17:08:00.001-05:00

Sorry had to get in on this one too. This is a week of giveaways at Simple Mom and this one was too cute to pass up...

See how to win a free customized blankie HERE

Another Giveaway!

2009-01-29T07:06:00.002-05:00

Head over to simple mom for another great giveaway! I really have loved this blog :) This week she is giving away an ebook to ten readers called A Month of Meals, which tells you about how to shop and plan meals for a month! This is something I have thought about more now that baby Miya's arrival is getting closer (we're in the 60's...crazy!)

Check out the details HERE.

Entering is as easy as leaving a comment stating your favorite family meal standby on a busy day.

~First Overnight Guest~

2009-01-27T07:47:00.006-05:00

We had a special little visitor over 2 weekends ago! Our sweet little nephew Brendon graced us with his presence Sunday into Monday evening and we had such a fun time with him.

He is such a good sleeper, and overall a happy little boy :) Here are some fun pictures of his stay:

Story time with Uncle Lew
cheese..

I think the camera was distracting him from his story :)

He loved playing under our table...it was so funny I would turn around and look for him and he would be under the chair or table entertaining himself :)

We had some extended PJ time :)
I'm not sure what he was thinking about here...

big cheese!

he stayed pretty close to uncle lew the whole time

I love his paci smiles...

We had some fun play time with cousins Naomi and Isaiah. It was so funny naomi kept poking him with her finger like she was trying to figure him out. Isaiah also kept asking me "is this your baby?" Even though he knows his cousin brendon, I think he was a little confused by him being at our house with out Jer and Rach.

Here Naomi is offering brendon a taste of her finger...watch out naomi he has teeth!

His reaction to the snowfall outside was sheer delight :) He was so mesmerized he even lost interest in his food!

Watching with Naomi...

More relaxing with Uncle Lew...

We had fun with this little man!

Pregnancy Brain at it's Best...

2009-01-27T07:20:00.002-05:00

I truly, in my arrogance, thought "preggo brain" was a joke. I heard stories about how your brain functions at "half speed" towards the end of your pregnancy, but really I just never thought it would happen to me. I really felt so coherent, and in fact many moments my brain felt like it was at "it's prime" especially since I am only working part time. I think what has really happened is I have forgotten what my old brain used to be like. Haha because pregnancy brain has hit, and folks and there is no denying it now.

Here is a little on how our Sunday morning went this week:

We're walking out to go to church and Lew starts looking around in the parking lot and then looks at me and says "Wasn't your car parked right here?" I just look around and think for a second. And he was right my car wasn't there. I just start turning around in circles looking for my car and start to panic eventually belting out "where is my car?!" We go inside and call the leasing office first just to see if my car had been towed for some strange reason, or if they knew anything about it. They didn't, and told us to call the non-emergency police. So we called them and they said "oh yes, that car was involved in an accident." I just panic, "what an accident! What do you mean an accident! I haven't driven my car since Wednesday!" The women didn't have any information for us so we had to call the towing company who towed our car. They didn't have any info either just that we needed to come pick up the car (and pay a very hefty fee) apparently my car had been towed on Saturday morning...and we also had to pay for "storage" because they held it overnight. Still we are very confused about what happened at this point. We get to my car and there is a note on the windshield basically saying "you failed to use your parking brake (I drive manual) and your car hit this parked vehicle. See their contact info below and contact your insurance company" Then I look at the back of my car and there is large dent on the back bumper. I think I had already cried about 10 times at this point....and once I saw the dent I was sure the other car must have been damaged too...so the tears came again. Basically we figured out what happened. Thursday morning when I was leaving for work my car wouldn't start. I didn't know why so I was trying to see if it was a problem with my clutch, put my car in neutral and tried starting it that way....and yes completely forgot to put my car back into gear! Ends up my battery was dead so I had to leave my car and it sat for days because we were going to get it fixed on Sunday after church. The funny thing is it sat in neutral for 2 days....but by day 3 it decided to roll. Apparently all this happened early saturday morning while we were sleeping. The police officer whom I was eventually able to speak with told me he would have tried to track me down instead of towing it but my address was still listed in Howard County (oops!) so he had no way of knowing where I was. So long story short it looks like there was no damage to the other persons car. My sweet and handy daddy was able to bang the dent out of my car and change my battery :) It was just the weirdest thing. I'm sure all the different people we had to talk to that day thought I was crazy. I felt so silly explaining my story over and over again especially to the insurance representative. Every conversation started something like this: "I know this is going to sound really strange, but I am 7 months pregnant and my car got towed I think yesterday because I had forgotten to put my parking break on 3 days ago because my battery was dead, and I didn't notice it because I don't drive that often and usually just ride with my husband...." The insurance rep was so funny she just listened to my story and said "oh my you poor thing, it's ok we'll take good care of you. This is why you pay us every month!" I think I cried at that moment too :)

Anyways I have had some other "fun" pregnancy moments and am learning I have to really pay attention to what I'm doing. Especially where I put things. Poor Lew keeps looking for his keys only to find them in odd places. Yesterday morning he looked and looked to finally find them in my purse. Why, no reason at all, I don't even remember putting them there. There was also the day I decided to work on the nursery and bake at the same time...and forgot to use the oven timer....Let's just say if I weren't baking biscotti these would have been some dry cookies! Thankfully they were supposed to be "tough" so I got away with it :) But of all preggo moments this tow truck experience was definitely the most expensive....and most memorable! I don't think I'll ever forget to put my car in gear again....I hope!

::More etsy love::

2009-01-16T11:04:00.004-05:00

Yes my obsession continues. I just finished putting up some decals we ordered from etsy right before the new year. I was really frightened of the whole idea, it just seemed so complicated. But much to my surprise (and delight!!) it was one of the easiest things I have done. As long as you follow the directions it is quick and easy, and kinda fun.

I ordered these decals from a shop called small time art. I would highly recommend this shop, he has a lot of fun selections and they are really well made (and a great price to top it off!) You can custom pick the colors you want, which is really nice.

Here are the pictures of the decals up in the nursery... They are sweet curly tree branches with birds perched on them:

I wanted them to be coming out of the corner right above our rocker...

I like to think of the big one as me and the little one as Miya...haha total pregnancy cheesiness right there :) And Lew isn't perched with us because he is off getting food...that's my bird story!

Here are some of my favorite decal shops on etsy right now that I wanted to pass along:
Studiojk
I bought these cute little playful bird decals from her shop and can't wait to put them up!
Circle line studio
I have never bought from this shop, but have seen some nice stuff and they have good prices.
Say it with style
She has fun decals, but also really nice metal plaques you can get custom made. We got one to hang in the kitchen that says: "Lewis Family...Since 2006" Lot's of fun, and good prices.

If you are wanting to buy decals I would totally recommend looking on etsy. I compared the prices on etsy verses other stores and there is such a huge price difference! And I just love the creativity you can find on etsy. (as you can tell)

I guess that's all for now... Oh here is a friend Lew would like me to introduce to you:
Meet Cassidy...our beloved owl pillow. Yes, everything in our nursery has been charmed with a name, by none other than my sweet husband.
I'm a little embarrassed posting her because, well I sewed her, and she is...much more than slightly less than perfect! Yeah, I tend to get impatient with these types of projects and by the end I am just trying to get it done! I didn't use a pattern, just had a picture in my mind and, tried to create with just that mental picture. Lew thinks Miya will appreciate her imperfection...I hope so :)

Self Control::Divine Grace

2009-01-13T11:36:00.002-05:00

Self Control has been an area that I have been working on lately, especially when it comes to my speech. This will come as no surprise (especially to those who are closest to me) that I can tend to speak before I think. Well let's just be honest here, I can even struggle with choosing to speak after I have thought about it and know I shouldn't say it. That is where the self-control issue comes in. Dear Lew, who tends to do very well in the area of self-control, has been kindly and patiently helping me to see where I am being impulsive with my words, which has been very helpful. Not only that, but it has been serving our marriage greatly! I have been studying proverbs which has been so convicting and encouraging at the same time. After a few incidents yesterday where I lacked self-control in my speech towards Lew I woke up today discouraged. I felt like there had been little progress in this area, 4 steps forward, 5 steps back. The main problem: I am looking to myself for change. When I think of self-control I tend to think of "self". It makes sense doesn't it? As I was reading in Charles Bridges Commentary on Proverbs this morning I saw self-control in a new light. Though I play a role in practicing self-control, ultimately just like any discipline, it comes down to divine grace. Here is the passage:

Proverbs 25:28 Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.
"...Every sign of irritation, every spark of pride burning in the heart, long before it shows itself in the countenance or on the tongue, must be resisted! A man may talk about self-control as if the reigns are in his own hands, But he who has been born of the Spirit and who has been taught of the plague that is in his own heart knows that effective self-control is a divine grace, and not a natural power. So what should we do? Upon the first assault fortify the walls by prayer. Do not place your trust in the strength of the citadel. have not repeated defeats taught us the need to call on better strength than our own? How could we enter into the conflict, much less win the fight, but for the promise that sin will not rule us (Romans 6:14). Oh, for the simple faith to draw out from this mighty source of energy, perseverance, and triumphant victory!" (Charles Bridges on Proverbs)

What a sweet reminder! Sin will not rule us. Self-control isn't really about self reign is it? It's divine grace which motivates obedience....and in the end triumphant victory is ours because of Calvary~

Romans 6:14
For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.

Baby countdown...12 weeks left

2009-01-13T09:48:00.004-05:00

Hard to believe I am 28 weeks....and in the 3rd trimester! I really think the holidays made the last 2 months fly, but now things seems to be slowing down a bit. That includes me. I seem to be hitting that glorious "I'm bloated, fatigued, and starting to waddle" phase of pregnancy. Don't get me wrong I still feel really good, and other than a really weak immune system leading to lots of upper respiratory/sinus infections, this has been a really uncomplicated pregnancy (praise the Lord), but I can already see a difference these past few weeks. My spring chicken, surges of energy, energizer bunny days of the second trimester already seem like a thing of the past. I feel like I could nap at any given moment, LOVE sitting, um make that laying down, whenever I can, and making dinner has looked like scrambled eggs and cereal. Thankfully I can still muster up the strength to work 2 days a week, exercise, and clean the apartment. I am just so glad we did most of our unpacking and organizing during my peak energy point! It looks like the timing of our move was absolutely perfect! Any later and my poor hubby would have been doing most of the work :)

Here is the most up to date belly:
For a fun comparison here is me at 12 weeks in the same clothing...

Lew and I decided this shirt has most likely seen it's last stretch :) It's funny but I don't ever remember being this small....but I do remember I felt so "huge" at this point!

On another note the nursery planning has been fun. We chose a birdie "aviary" theme. So we have lots of birds/owls which is totally random b/c I never was interested in either before pregnancy but now I would say I am borderline obsessed. I am going to some how find a way to incorporate this verse...

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ~Matt 6:26

Here is a little sneak peak, I will post the "final" product when it's finished, I am still waiting on some prints to hang and our special birdie mobile...

That is sweet camille the owl in the corner , yeah I'm pretty much obsessed with her. I bought her on etsy from a shop called skunkboy creatures they are very special little animals :)

This blanket (also from etsy) was the inspiration for room. I loved the little birds and the colors so we pretty much picked everything based off of this blanket. Our bedding is quite a "hodgepodge" of colors and patterns. I bought everything seperate because I just couldn't find anything that wasn't too matchy matchy. So our primary colors are: red, pink, black and yellow, with some green and light blue...that definitely covers the whole spectrum huh!?

Lew has laughed so hard because I pretty much wanted to get everything from etsy.com. So far most things are from there. I just love all the cute creative stuff on there, and usually the prices are good for getting something totally homemade, and I love the idea of supporting a starving artist :) One day Lew sent me a gchat saying: "having fun shoppingon etsy?" and I thought, "huh how does he know" totally forgetting our paypal account is linked to his work email so he was getting a ton of emails saying "your paypal payment has been accepted" :) I just laughed...I was defintely caught in the act!

Well thats pretty much the update for now. I have my glucose screening test tomorrow am, which Im really looking forward to getting that over with. I have to fast which pretty much stinks, but hopefully I will pass and not have to encounter the 3 hour glucose tolerance test!!

Christmas day

2009-01-02T10:28:00.007-05:00

We spent Christmas day at my parents. Lew and I woke up early (not on purpose it's just some days my body will refuse to sleep past 6am :/) The day started with a yummy breakfast at my parents followed by exchanging some gifts between my parents, Charissa, and us. Then the a yummy lunch with the whole family. Then came the exchange with all the kiddos, boy was it a sight to see! It was so funny to watch the older kids tear open their gifts while the younger ones looked on with awe not so sure about the whole thing. Once Isaiah was done with his gifts he was happy to go around and open everyone else's with them :) It was a ball to watch them having so much fun, as well as watching all the parents trying to keep order! Hard to believe in just a few months my parents will have 6 grandkids under the age of 3!!

Some pictures...

Sam and Pri

Rissa and Tommy
Rachel and Jer trying to get a smile from Naomi, but only getting a pout...

Gianna was enjoying a special treat in this picture, I don't know what it was but something chocolate :)

Cutie pie...with her mouth full!
Gianna opening presents

Naomi in her princess outfit. Isaiah kept saying "look Naomi is a princess!"

A very happy boy opening presents

she had the whole opening presents thing down along with the older kiddos
a happy girly

Gianna looking at her toys...
amongst the packages...

I wish I would have gotten more pictures! There was so much going on I kept setting down my camera and forgetting to take picture...

Hope you and your families had a wonderful Christmas as well!!

Not a teenager anymore.

2009-01-02T10:03:00.005-05:00

Hard to believe my baby sister Rissa has entered her twenties. I look at her all grown up and can't believe how the time has flown! She got very exciting news this fall when she found out that she got accepted into the very same nursing program I graduated from. She will be starting in January! I am so excited for her, she will make an excellent nurse :)

Rissa I love you and respect you so much! You have grown into such a beautiful woman, I can't wait to see all God has in store for you this year!

Pictures from her b-day celebration with the family:

Rissa and Tommy. (I just noticed her hair is blowing around in this picture..I think she was sitting in front of the heater :))

The birthday girl with her large cookie cake

Haha Isaiah is attempting to help her blow her candles out all the way from his seat :P

Sweet Naomi under the tree

Little Gianna, she is getting so big!

Playing with Uncle Lew

Little B wasn't feeling so well this day :( but was still as cute as ever

Isaiah making me say "cheese"

the "littlest" for now :) Julia I love her sweet little face!

My little "mini-me" I look at her and see myself at her age, she is so full of spunk :) So much fun...
More of sweet Julia
Trying to get a picture with the two oldest....Isaiah had his eyes fixed on something else...
Naomi's "partial scowl" She gets this super serious look on her face when she isn't so sure...

I broke her and got a smile :)

Uncle Lew and Gi-Gi

Ah,fun times with family...Hard to believe how the kids are all getting so big!

Merry Christmas, wait Happy New Year!

2009-01-02T09:45:00.003-05:00

Hard to believe both have passed! And I just realized I haven't posted anything since our anniversary trip. Our days have been so full these past few weeks. Between unpacking, organizing, settling, celebrating holidays and birthdays, and just the ordinary stuff of life we haven't had much time to blog.

I also had a little scare this week where I was having multiple contractions very close together and went in to be tested for pre-term labor. Thankfully the contractions aren't doing anything, and the doctor confirmed it was not pre-term labor. He thinks it was a combination of the bronchitis I am fighting and just being worn out. It seems like I am picking up lots of nasty "bugs" this pregnancy, which I guess makes sense since I am exposed to so many sick kiddos. But I would love prayers that my immune system would pick up enough to help me stay well until my delivery! I am trying to pump my body full of vitamin C and I have been trying to work out every day which seems to help too. My OB has been so great, treating me with every bout of bronchitis/sinus infections, this time he even gave me an antibiotic with refills for "next time" but I am praying there will be no next time. This week has consisted of much needed rest, which Miya and I have throroughly enjoyed!

So, instead of filling this post with updates I will do individual posts for each thing. I have lots of pictures I have had hanging around in my camera...

2 years...time flies

2008-12-17T08:52:00.004-05:00

Amazing how 2 years can fly right by you! I was just thinking as we were celebrating 2 years of marriage: "would we have seen ourselves where we are now at this point 2 years ago?" It's amazing to reflect on all the fun surprises God had in store for our first 2 years of marriage! We have thought about all the time we spent praying and wondering if God had called us to this area, or if we should move out of state (which ultimately led us to the decision that we are called here) I finished nursing school and started working my first job as a nurse in the PICU at UMMC...only to find myself unexpectedly getting pregnant and having a miscarriage my second month there. Then (much to our surprise again!) finding out we are expecting only 4 months later! God has had so many fun things in store for us when we were least expecting it. Then the most recent changes, leaving my job for something closer and part time, and moving out of our home sweet home with the Hendricks to move into our 2 bedroom apartment just a week ago. God has so kindly provided along the way, and more than anything we are aware that His plans are much better than any that we could conjure up on our own. We never would have known at this point last year that my sister and her family would be moving back from Charlotte and that God would kindly place us in the same apartment complex (right next to each other!!) and what a joy that has been. She has been such a help to me as we have been getting settled in and I have loved having the kiddos over to play and keep me company while I get used to apartment living :) I also had the kind help of my sister-in-law Rachel who graciously (and if you know my hatred for hanging up and putting away clothes you know how much this means to me) organized our walk in closet! We are finally feeling like we are getting somewhat settled in and I will post pictures for the family of our new little home very soon!

In other events my sweet husband has taken me away for 2 days to celebrate our anniversary to our MOST favorite place the Carriage Inn. This bed and breakfast (in Charlestown WV) is by FAR the absolute best we have every encountered. We have daringly tried a few others in the surrounding area, and they don't even come close to this one. The hosts are so warm and welcoming, the home is so beautiful and peaceful and full of history, the breakfasts are truly the best we have ever had in our lives, I could go on and on and on... but then I will sound like a commercial. Seriously if your looking for a peaceful getaway you should check them out!

We had such a relaxing time together, even though it sleeted and rained all day yesterday it gave us an excuse to sit in our cozy room by the fire with nowhere to go and nowhere to be (oh and not to mention nothing to unpack or organize!). It has been such a welcomed 2 days of rest. And yes we got in lots of boggle, we sure know how to celebrate :)

Here are a few pictures of our time:

Our cozy room the Copper Beech Suite

In front of their beautiful tree

Our anniversary dinner at "the dish"

Happy 2 years my love. Life is truly better with you by my side. I am so so thankful for the gift you are to me!